Debbie Cook Files to dissolve Restraining Order

Here is the latest on Debbie Cook from the Village Voice written by Tony Ortega:

Yesterday, Debbie Cook began her defense against Scientology’s lawsuit which seeks $300,000 in damages because she dared to speak out to her fellow church membersin an e-mail sent on New Year’s Eve.

Cook, through her newly hired San Antonio attorney, Ray B. Jeffrey, filed to dissolve the temporary restraining order that Scientology was granted a week ago which prevents her from talking to anyone — even her own husband — about the case or about Scientology. Friday morning, a hearing will be held over Cook’s motion, but we are learning that the real fireworks are coming next Thursday, when a hearing about a temporary injunction will give Cook the opportunity to introduce evidence that Jeffrey characterizes as “beyond the pale of what a human being should endure.”

We spoke at length with Jeffrey today about Cook’s plans to fight back against Scientology, and about his own preparations for what he acknowledges is likely to be a long, and brutal contest.

According to Jeffrey’s website, he’s a veteran of more than 75 trials since 1989, and served as the mayor of Bulverde, a San Antonio suburb, for a couple of years.

But I asked him what his experience is in litigation with the Church of Scientology.

“None. I’ve had a mild interest over the years. I’ve always been aware of Scientology, but that’s the full extent of it. Coincidentally I read the Reitman book on vacation last summer. It was quite fascinating,” he says, referring to Janet Reitman’s history of the church, last year’s Inside Scientology.

Jeffrey explained that when Scientology filed its lawsuit, it requested, and was granted, a temporary restraining order. “They’re only good for 14 days,” he says, “so they’re really easy to get.”

The TRO runs out next week, and the next step in the process is for there to be a hearing to see if the same restrictions on Cook will be continued in a temporary injunction, which could last the duration of the case.

In other words, Cook could simply wait a few more days for the TRO to expire, and then really begin to fight the case. Instead, as a measure of how anxious she is to take on the church in this matter, she filed a motion yesterday to dissolve the TRO. That’s what will be discussed in a hearing tomorrow morning.

“What we’ve done is rather than wait around, rather than wait until next Thursday, there are so many problems with the restraining order, we’re asking that it be dissolved. We’re able to do that on only two days notice,” Jeffrey says. “We’ll argue that they didn’t follow the law in getting this TRO and that they didn’t follow the rules for any kind of injunctive relief.”

Jeffrey explained that the TRO is stunningly broad. “It prohibits her from going and getting a lawyer and defending herself in the lawsuit. It’s that broad. She’s barred from talking to anyone, even her husband. That on its face is completely inappropriate,” he says.

Also, he points out, the church has not explained how it is being harmed by Cook’s actions so far, which amounts to an e-mail sent to her fellow church members that complained that her religion had gotten away from its underlying principles.

“The church has an obligation to show what is the irreparable harm that will occur if she is not enjoined from speaking. They don’t even make an attempt to spell out what that is. It’s just an abusive TRO. I hope that it will be dissolved. If not, it just stays in place until next Thursday, the hearing for the temporary injunction.”

I asked him for a preview of what might come out in that hearing next week, and he said they would enter evidence for how Cook and her husband Wayne Baumgarten were compelled to sign such seemingly draconian non-disclosure agreements.

“The shame of it is, she’s still a faithful Scientologist with great love for the church and doesn’t wish any ill on the church. And why they would squash her, when she has done nothing more than communicate with other Scientologists about the direction of the church, and in a very positive way,” he says. “I want to point out, however, that the Texas Constitution is even more protective of free speech than the federal Constitution.”

And if the court denies her requests?

“We could seek extraordinary relief from the appellate court, and I’m confident that would be granted,” he says.

I asked Jeffrey if he was aware of Scientology’s litigation history — its reputation for “scorched earth” tactics.

“I fully understand that they’re going to argue and fight over everything, and they’re a multiple billion dollar organization,” he says.

And Debbie? Is she up for a prolonged fight?

“For 17 years she supervised well over a thousand employees, managed a budget of 150 million dollars a year, worked extreme hours, had incredible pressures,” Jeffrey says. “You know that saying, that which does not kill you makes you stronger? Well, she’s ready.”

And the other side? I asked him about George Spencer, the local attorney that Scientology hired. (I’ve put in a call to Spencer and will update this if I hear from him.)

“He’s a respected lawyer in San Antonio,” Jeffrey says. “He’s the son of one of the founders of the firm, Clemens and Spencer. His wife is a probate court judge in San Antonio. And I’ll tell you something interesting. His co-counsel, Mark Cannan, was the attorney for the San Antonio Express-News. He is knowledgeable about First Amendment law, and he should know better, in my opinion.”

Debbie Cook Coverage in the Village Voice

January 1: Scientology rocked by allegations of greed in e-mail to 12,000 church members

January 3: Is Scientology imploding? Watching the panic after a former executive dares to question church management

January 4: Scientology in crisis: Debbie Cook’s transformation from enforcer to whistleblower

January 6: Scientology in turmoil: Debbie Cook’s e-mail, annotated

January 31: Scientology sues Debbie Cook over her New Year’s Eve e-mail

Also, please see our primer, “What is Scientology?

Tony Ortega is the editor-in-chief of The Village Voice. Since 1995, he’s been writing about Scientology at several publications.

The Church of Scientology is Suing Debbie Cook

Hello readers! Fresh from The Tampa Bay Times from my friend Joe Childs, I just got the news that David Miscavige did not like Debbie’s New Year email and her quoting LRH. It probably made waves and he is doing what he does best: Hate and destruction!

I want to point out the following things in this litigation:

* By suing her the Church is disclosing their own documents that are not suposed to be disclosed.

* It is a high crime for a Scientologist to sue another scientologist, therefore they are in fact violating policy.

* She didn’t state anything that isn’t already known or publicly available, and she did not technically make a public statement.

* “Signing under ‘extreme duress” will be hard to prove since they each received $50,000 for signing the agreement. She also received thousands of dollars in bonuses over the years for her reg cycles.

* For those who are interested, hearing is set for Thursday 9 February 2012 at 9 a.m. in the Bexar County 150th District Court in San Antonio Texas.

* The Creed of the Church says:
“That all men have inalienable rights to think freely, to talk freely, to write freely their own opinions and to counter or utter or write upon the opinions of others”.

Here it is from Joe Childs:

Church of Scientology sues longtime Clearwater leader over New Year’s Eve email

By Joe Childs and Thomas C.Tobin,

Times Staff Writers
Tampa Bay Times Posted: Jan 30, 2012 07:58 PM

The Church of Scientology has sued its longtime Clearwater leader Debbie Cook after she publicly questioned the church’s aggressive fundraising tactics and other practices.

The lawsuit — filed Friday in San Antonio, Texas, where Cook lives — reveals that the church paid Cook and her husband, Wayne Baumgarten, $50,000 each to remain silent about their time on church staff.

Cook, 50, worked 17 years as the church’s top official in Clearwater, Scientology’s worldwide spiritual headquarters. Serving in the post of “captain,” she presided over an operation that brought in $1.7 billion for the church during that time.

Cook and Baumgarten each signed non-disclosure agreements as they left the staff in October 2007. All told, Cook had worked in the church’s religious order, the Sea Org, for 29 years.

The church alleges in the lawsuit that the couple violated the agreements when Cook circulated a New Year’s Eve letter urging Scientologists to work internally to reform the church. The letter went to thousands of church members.

Arguing that it faced “substantial risk of imminent harm and irreparable injury,” the church asked for and received an order temporarily restraining Cook and Baumgarten from saying anything more.

In a statement to the Tampa Bay Times, church spokesman Karin Pouw described the payments to the couple as “help,” saying each willingly accepted the money as part of a legally binding agreement. “Only with recent violations of that agreement was it necessary for the church to pursue and protect its rights,” Pouw said.

The agreements, filed with the lawsuit, provide a rare look at the extraordinary lengths the church goes to to keep its inner workings secret. Among the restrictions on Cook and Baumgarten:

• They waived their First Amendment rights to free speech.

• They can never, “in perpetuity,” disclose any information about the church, its staff or former staff.

• They can never publish, attempt to publish or help anyone publish any information about the church in any media, including newspapers, television, radio or the Internet.

• They can never utter a disparaging word about the church, either directly or indirectly.

The couple agreed to stiff penalties for violating the agreement, including a minimum of $100,000 for each disparaging Internet posting, each television broadcast or each newspaper story.

The church alleges in the lawsuit that news of Cook’s “disparaging emails” reached more than 24 million people via television and radio shows and newspaper stories, including reports in the Times.

Her letter criticized “extreme” money raising tactics used by church staff and said the church had amassed well over $1 billion in reserves. It questioned the church’s strategy of building new churches called “Ideal Orgs” around the world, calling the buildings unnecessarily “posh.”

It alleged that the “complex and balanced command structure” put in place by the late Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard no longer existed, and it said Scientology was being run by a single leader, David Miscavige.

The letter also said many Scientologists are reaching the upper levels of spiritual awareness only to be told they must redo lower-level services at great expense.

These practices are against Hubbard’s policies, and all members are obligated under those policies to report and correct internal problems, the letter stated.

Pouw did not answer several questions about the agreements signed by Cook and Baumgarten and said the newspaper’s inquiry “fits your controversy-laden agenda.” She said the Times should be reporting on the 15 “Ideal Orgs” set to open this year, including two recent ribbon cuttings in Hamburg, Germany, and Sacramento, Calif.

Before filing the lawsuit, the church wrote Cook to demand she stop violating the agreement. The lawsuit said Cook responded last Thursday, stating in an email that she would not give up her right to free speech and declaring: “If you sue me, it really doesn’t matter … I have no money to spend on an attorney.”

Cook wrote to the Times after her letter was made public saying she lamented that the media had gotten word of her New Year’s Eve letter. It was not intended for outside eyes unfamiliar with the church, she wrote. “It was clearly intended as a communication amongst Scientologists.”

Joe Childs can be reached at Thomas C. Tobin can be reached at

Additional information:

Link to the article:…rs-eve/1213102

The lawsuit here:…2/3143_001.pdf

Her agreement she was coerced to sign here:…2/3144_001.pdf

Case Number: 2012CI01272
Business/Last Name: WAYNE BAUMGARTEN
Litigant Type: DEFENDANT
Court: 150
Date Filed: 01/27/2012
Case Status: PENDING

Case Number: 2012CI01272
Litigant Type: DEFENDANT
Court: 150
Date Filed: 01/27/2012
Case Status: PENDING

A Message From Debbie Cook the Captain Flag Service Org

               Dear friends! Happy New Year!

I am starting the New Year 2012 with the latest from Debbie Cook the former Flag Captain.

Here are Debbie and husband Wayne Baumgarten taken this last Xmas

I have just learned that Debbie Cook allegedly sent this message to approximately twelve thousand OT Scientologists, yes,  you read correctly; 12,000 scientologists around the world. 

I don’t know if this is true, but it is still a very well written letter with a lot of VALID references.

 If this message comes from her, then she is very brave for asking scientologists to stop donating to the IAS and any other Scientology fundraisings as well as exposing the truth about what is happening in upper management. I wish that she had done this 20 years ago.

                                            Message from Debbie Cook

Dear friend,

I am emailing you as a friend and fellow Scientologist. As we enter a new year, it is hoped that 2012 can be a year of great dissemination and a year of real progress up The Bridge for all Scientologists.

Although I am not in the Sea Org right now, I served in the Sea Org at Flag for 29 years. 17 of those years were as Captain FSO. I am a trained auditor and C/S as well as an OEC, FEBC and DSEC.

I am completely dedicated to the technology of Dianetics and Scientology and the works of LRH. I have seen some of the most stunning and miraculous results in the application of LRH technology and I absolutely know it is worth fighting to keep it pure and unadulterated.

My husband and I are in good standing and we are not connected with anyone who is not in good standing. We have steadfastly refused to speak to any media, even though many have contacted us.

But I do have some very serious concerns about out-KSW that I see permeating the Scientology religion.

I have the utmost respect for the thousands of dedicated Scientologists and Sea Org members. Together, we have come through everything this world could throw at us and have some real impingement on the world around us. I am proud of our accomplishments and I know you are too. However there is no question that this new age of continuous fundraising is not our finest moment.

LRH says in HCO PL 9 Jan 51, An Essay on Management, “drop no curtains between the organization and the public about anything.” -LRH

Based on this policy I am communicating to you about some situations that we need to do something about within our religion, within our group.
Actions that are either not covered in policy or directly violate LRH policy and tech include:

* The extreme over-regging and fund-raising activities that have become so much a part of nearly every Sea Org org and Class V org as well as every “OT Committee” is not covered anywhere in LRH policy.

* Hardworking Sea Org members and the dedicated staff of orgs around the world aren’t choosing to do these actions. Nor are the OTs.

I am sure they would be more than happy if they could just get on with direct dissemination of Scientology as they have done for so many years.

But the truth is that this is being driven from the very highest echelons within the Scientology structure and clearly there is a lot of pressure to make targets that are being set.

* The IAS: The IAS was created unbeknownst to LRH in 1984 by Marc Yager and David Miscavige.

This was supposed to be based on LRH policies on the subject of membership and the HASI, however the IAS is nothing like the membership system described by LRH which only has two memberships and is covered in HCO PL 22 March 1965 “Current Promotion and Org Program Summary, Membership Rundown” and states:

“There are two memberships…”- LRH

LRH lists there the INTERNATIONAL ANNUAL MEMBERSHIP and gives its cost at 10 pounds sterling or $30 US. He also lists a LIFETIME MEMBERSHIP which is priced at $75 US. There are no other memberships or statuses approved or known to LRH.

* Furthermore, membership monies are supposed to go directly to the org where the membership is signed up, and the money used for dissemination by that org, in that area. This is covered in HCOPL 1 Sept 1965R Membership Policies.
“It all goes into the HCO Book Account in the area where the membership is brought and is not part of the organization’s weekly gross income. Membership monies go to dissemination”.- LRH

* Currently membership monies are held as Int reserves and have grown to well in excess of a billion dollars.

Only a tiny fraction has ever been spent, in violation of the policy above.

Only the interest earned from the holdings have been used very sparingly to fund projects through grants.

In fact many of the activities you see at IAS events are not actually funded by the IAS, but rather by the Scientologists involved.

* Think about it, how many ads disseminating Scientology, Dianetics or any Scn affiliated programs have you seen on TV? Heard on the radio? Seen in newspapers? I haven’t seen one in the 4 years I have lived in San Antonio, Texas, the 7th largest city in the US. How many have you seen?

* Donating anything more than a lifetime membership to the IAS is not based on LRH policy.

The article “What Your Donations Buy” (The Auditor, The Monthly Journal of Scientology No. 51, 1970) is clearly talking about how the church uses your donations for Dianetics and Scientology services.

* Next time you are asked to donate outside of services, realize that you are engaged in fundraising and ask to see something in writing from L. Ron Hubbard that this is something he expects from you as a Scientologist.

New Org Buildings:

* LRH also never directed the purchase of opulent buildings or the posh renovations or furnishings for every org.

In fact, if you read HCO PL 12 March 75 Issue II, “The Ideal Org”, which is what this program has been called, and nowhere in it will you find 20 million dollar buildings or even any reference to the poshness of org premises at all as part of LRH’s description of an “Ideal Org”.

Instead, an Ideal Org was one that delivered and moved people up The Bridge – something that is not part of this “Ideal Org” program.

LRH says in the PL that an Ideal Org: “would be clean and attractive enough not to repel its public” – LRH. This is all it says about the state of the building.

* As a result of this off-policy alteration of the Ideal Org PL, we have the majority of top OTs, now deemed “OT Ambassadors”, heavily engaged in fund-raising activities that include “bingo”, “pirate dinners”, “knitting classes”, “hay rides”, and many other activities strictly revolving around raising funds for the required multi-millions of dollars to fund their “Ideal Org”.

As part of this, people around every org are now asked to donate to their local “Ideal Org” instead of their own services or their own Bridge.
LRH says in HCO PL Org Ethics and Tech:

“GET RID OF DISTRACTIONS FROM SCIENTOLOGY in your org. Baby-sitting or raffle tickets and such nonsense.”
* Yet these distractions are rampant as they are being used as fund-raisers to get money for the huge quotas being issued to fund the “Ideal Org”.

“If the org slumps… don’t engage in ‘fund-raising’ or ‘selling postcards’ or borrowing money.
Just make more income with Scientology.

It’s a sign of very poor management to seek extraordinary solutions for finance outside Scientology. It has always failed.”

“For orgs as for pcs, ‘Solve It With Scientology’.

“Every time I myself have sought to solve financial or personnel in other ways than Scientology I have lost out. So I can tell you from experience that org solvency lies in more Scientology, not patented combs or fund-raising barbeques.”
HCO PL 24 February 1964, Issue II, Org Programming, (OEC Vol. 7, p. 930)

The point is that Scientologists and OT’s need to be training, auditing and disseminating to raw public- not regging each other or holding internal fundraisers.

                                                         Out Tech:

 * Over the last few years we have seen literally hundreds and hundreds of people who were validated as clear using the CCRD as developed by LRH now being told they are not Clear.

This included hundreds of OTs who were then put onto NED as a “handling”. LRH clearly forbid any Dianetics to be run on OTs in HCOB “Dianetics Forbidden on OTs”.

 This is out tech.

This entire technical “handling” was directed personally by COB RTC and was done on thousands of OTs.

But it was based not on an LRH HCO Bulletin, but rather based on a single C/S instruction where LRH C/Sed one pre-OT who had not achieved the state of clear but was mid OT III and not making it.

LRH directed a solo handling that the pre-OT was to do to get himself to achieve the state of Clear.

This LRH C/S taken out of context was then used to implement a technical handling that was in direct violation of an LRH HCOB.

* This and other “technical handlings” done on Solo NOTs auditors created great expense and hardship on Solo NOTs auditors around the world as they were made to do these handlings to continue on the level.

* Then there are the “fast grades at Flag” that no other org has.

How can it be that Flag has been delivering grades differently to the rest of the world for the last 3 years?

Whatever the problem is, the fact is that having “fast Grades” at Flag creates a hidden data line and is a HIGH CRIME and the subject of an entire policy letter called “TECH DEGRADES” which LRH has placed at the start of every Scientology course.

* More recently the fad seems to be that nearly everyone needs to “re-do their Purif and do a long objectives program”, including many OTs mid Solo NOTs.
* There is nothing wrong with doing objectives, but it is a clear violation of HCOB ‘MIXING RUNDOWNS AND REPAIRS” to have a person mid a rundown or OT level be taken off it and placed on an objectives program.

* Solo NOTs auditors are also being made to get their objectives from a Class IX auditor at great expense as they are not being allowed to co-audit.

* Flag has made many millions of dollars on the above listed out tech handlings because:

 OTs mid Solo NOTs are forced to get these out-tech actions to be able to get back onto and stay on the level and complete it. Not to mention the spiritual effects of the out tech that this has on each OT.

* I myself was subject to these out tech “handlings”, including extensive FPRD mid Solo NOTs. It took its toll in many ways, including physical situations I am still dealing with today. So I have some reality of the hardship caused.

                                               LRH Command Structure

* LRH left us with a complex and balanced command structure, with our orgs led by the Office of ED International.

This office was considered so important that LRH created a special management group called the Watch Dog Committee whose only purpose was to see that this office and the other needed layers of management existed.

* LRH ED 339R speaks of this extensively as the protection for our Church.

But these people are missing.

And not just some.

As of just a few years ago there were no members of the office of ED Int on post, not to mention top execs throughout the International Management structure.

You may have also wondered… where is Heber, the President of the Church?

What about Ray Mitthoff, Senior C/S International, the one that LRH personally turned over the upper OT Levels to?

How about Norman Starkey, LRH’s Trustee?

What happened to Guillaume – Executive Director International?

And Marc Yeager, the WDC Chairman?

What happened to the other International Management executives that you have seen at events over the years? 

                                      The truth

Is that I spent weeks working in the empty International Management building at Int.

Empty because everyone had been removed from post.

When I first went up lines I was briefed extensively by David Miscavige about how bad all of them were and how they had done many things that were all very discreditable.

This seemed to “explain” the fact that the entirety of the Watchdog Committee no longer existed.

The entirety of the Executive Strata, which consisted of ED International and 11 other top International executives that were the top executives in their particular fields, no longer existed. That the Commodore’s Messenger Org International no longer existed.

     All of these key command structures of Scientology International, put there by LRH, had been removed.

* There were hundreds and hundreds of unanswered letters and requests for help from org staff, written based on LRH ED 339R where LRH says that staff can write to these top executives in the Exec Strata for help.

* But this is not possible if all these execs have been removed and no one is there to help them or to get evaluations and programming done to expand Scientology.

* Well, after that I got to spend some quality time with Heber, Ray Mithoff, Norman Starkey, Guillaume, as well as the entirety of International Management at the time, who were all off post and doing very long and harsh ethics programs.

*  These have gone on for years and to the only result of that they are still off post. There is no denying that these top executives have all gradually disappeared from the scene. You don’t see them at the big events anymore or on the ship at Maiden Voyage.

* David Miscavige has now become the “leader” of the Scientology religion.

* Yet what LRH left behind was a huge structure to properly manage all aspects of the Scientology religion.

* He put a complete and brilliant organizational structure there, not one individual.

* There never was supposed to be a “leader” other than LRH himself as the goal maker for our group.

* There is a situation here and even if you have not been to the International Management Base you should be able to see that over regging and frequent tech changes are not OK and you have a responsibility to do something to Keep Scientology Working.

* You should be able to find and read the references on membership in OEC Volume 6. Find and read the HCO PL entitled “The Ideal Org” (Data Series 40).

* Find and read the references on org buildings, including HCO PL 24 Aug 65 II, Cleanliness of Quarters and Staff, Improve our Image. Also, HCO PL 17 June 69, The Org Image.

If you don’t want to make waves or put yourself in danger of being taken off the level or denied eligibility, then there are some simple things you can do:

First and foremost

* Withdraw your support from off policy actions.

* Stop donating to anything other than your own services and actual Bridge progress.

* Simply demand to see an LRH reference that says you are required to make other such donations.

          No one will be able to produce any references because there aren’t any.

* Stop supporting any of the activities that are being done to forward off-policy fund-raising in your area.

                                     LRH says what he expects of a Scientologist

– That is what he expects you to do. In fact he put it in HCOB 10 June 1960 Issue I, Keeping Scientology Working Series 33, WHAT WE EXPECT OF A SCIENTOLOGIST. Read it and follow it.

* The other thing you can do is to send this email to as many others as you can, even if you do it anonymously.

* Please keep this email among us, the Scientologists. The media have no place in this.

You may wonder why I have not written a KR and gone about my business.

The answer is, I have. But there is no longer anyone to send that KR to.

* But you can and should write reports and bring off-policy to the attention of local org executives and local Sea org members.

We are a strong and powerful group and we can affect a change. We have weathered many storms. I am sorry that I am the one telling you, but a new storm is upon us. Its waves are already in the media and the world around us.

The truth is that as a Scientologist you are more able, more perceptive and have a higher integrity. Scientology is supposed to make you “think for yourself” and never compromise your own integrity. And most certainly LRH held every Scientologist responsible to KEEP SCIENTOLOGY WORKING.

I am not trying to do anything other than affect a change in serious off policy actions occurring. My husband and I have most of our family and many many good friends who are Scientologists.

I have not been real interested in sticking my neck out like this. However, I also know that I dedicated my entire adult life to supporting LRH and the application of LRH technology and if I ever had to look LRH in the eye I wouldn’t be able to say I did everything I could to Keep Scientology Working if I didn’t do something about it now.

We all have a stake in this. It is simply not possible to read the LRH references and not see the alterations and violations that are currently occurring.

You have a very simple obligation to LRH. Don’t participate in anything off policy, and let others know they should not either.

If every person who reads this email does nothing more than step back from off-policy actions we would have changed direction.

If we took all that energy and directed it into auditing, training and raw public dissemination, we would be winning.
And that is what I wish for you and all of us as we ring in this new year.


Debbie Cook

Here is a statement where she answers to her friends who asked her if she indeed is the author of such email.

Debbie Jean Cook: Dear Friends, Yes, the email was written by me. No I am not connected to anyone not in good standing. I did it because of my love and respect for LRH and the desire to see us correct situations that need correcting within our group

Theta Arrives at Golden Era Productions!

RON’s  Org  OTs  and auditors headed by Max and Erica Hauri came to Los Angeles from Russia, Switzerland, Germany and other parts of Europe, to visit the city and to meet with other Scientologists.  We were very happy to be their host here while in town. 

They visited AOLA, CCI, LA Org and the LRH Life Exhibition. They were welcomed by the staff and were  given tours of the premises.  It was a nice surprise. I assume they did not know who they were…LOL!

And while they had a very busy itinerary, one of the high points on their calendar was to visit  Golden Era Productions in Gillman’s Hot Springs in Riverside County California.



We soon all drove from Los Angeles (in many cars)  and agreed to meet in Beaumont to regroup and plan the visit. It was a glorious sunny but windy day.

We were all very excited with the prospect of visiting the Headquarters and had high expectations of course.

Here are Max, Erica and some of the students at the meeting place waiting for the others to arrive.



Then more people started arriving little by little



They all had great expectations! They had come from so far away!



The beautiful San Bernardino Mountains in the background.



                       Ready for the mission to Golden Era Productions! 



They were taking pictures all over the place, everything was so interesting and exciting!



  We soon got there all together and started marching alongside the road one by one towards Golden Era Compound




We were met by a private Golden Era security, someone told me that his name is Danny Dunigan the people from Europe were surprised and they thought it was the local police. I explained who they were.



They could not stop Max and Erica despite of it all and they went ahead with the tour.  Soon we all followed.  I was very busy taking pictures and videos.



We continued marching despite their abrupt,  curt manners and you can see the lone security officer Danny Dunigan,  running trying to catch up with us feeling dismayed and totally powerless with so many OTs determined to visit the place no matter what.



On the way to Golden Era Productions I talked to an ex-SO whose father came all the way to LA from Germany to take her back home twenty six years ago. She is very happy he did and now this is a trip down  memory lane for her. I am sorry that the sound is not very good but it was very windy.


 They really tried to stop us and they were very aggressive. Notice in the video that Max did not get intimidated by them and kept  on Marching all by himself,  while the rest were not so sure what to do after the threats of having us all arrested. 

In the meantime, I was very busy filming the staff that came to meet us. They were doing what they thought was right and forgot manners, ARC, Theta comm, what is greatness, etc.  Here is a video of us arriving.




                         This is myself arriving at Golden Era Productions 



Here is an interview of Max Hauri, leader of the OT group giving us his impressions of his visit to Golden Era as we arrive just behind him.



Here is a video of myself, describing what happened after the SO staff left and we were able to enjoy the view



At the end we prevailed, they just gave up and left us alone.

Here we are as a group at the entrance of the compound. We are all very happy that we made it and that the Church staff were not able to stop us!



Before we left Max and his group of OTs gathered in a circle and postulated theta and freedom into the place.



                                    They  felt very happy!


Here are more pictures with happy faces



After all this, we went back home and exchanged impressions about the trip and plans for the future.



 All in all the trip was a total success!  Just Beautiful!


My email address:


A very Theta International Scientology Gathering

We recently welcomed Max and Erica Hauri and their group from RON’s Org in our house.  They came to Los Angeles to meet other Scientologists, make new friends, share their knowledge, stories and spread Theta in the environment. They also went on a goodwill trip to Golden Era Productions in Gillman Springs.

This past weekend we hosted an out door gathering at our house  on our back deck surrounded by trees and gardens.  Many of my friends and PCs  from Los Angeles participated and we were able to shared a wonderful experience with thetans from Switzerland, Germany, Moscow, Kiev, Vladivostok and other parts of Russia.

The weather in Autumn in LA is cool but had turned for the better and was actually a balmy winter evening. It felt wonderful and I imagined for a moment it was the middle of summer and not the beginning of winter as the week before we had huge rainy windy storms.

We enjoyed an afternoon with a spectacular sunset and an evening with a beautiful moon.  We all enjoyed the music and danced way into the evening.

My friends brought the most delicious desserts, salads and a diversity of foods,  as well as music and fun conversations.

Doug Parent and Theresa Vivanco delighted us with fabulous Jazz music. It was fantastic!

 I joined Theresa and sang old Spanish songs, nobody understood what we were saying but they seemed to like it! LOL!

Our Russian friendss decided they were not going to be left behind and serenaded us with some Russian folk songs.

My friends showered me with many presents, from chocolates, a bracelet, a book about Switzerland a plaque with a tiger,  the symbol of Russia,  a little handmade bag,  flowers,  candles,  picture of LRH and the best present of them all ~ their love!

They also presented me with the most amazing Matryoshka doll. It is a Russian nesting doll which is a set of wooden dolls of decreasing size placed one inside the other. The first Russian nested doll set was carved in 1890.


Matryoshka dolls are often designed to follow a particular theme.  For instance peasant girls in traditional dress, but the theme can be anything from fairy tale characters to Soviet leaders.

Max and Erica Hauri gave a presentation about the history of RON’s Org and their future plans in Europe and the rest of the world.

They invited us to Bern Switzerland and presented us with a book of the best places to visit in their country.

During the party we heard people speaking in Russian, German, English, Spanish and French. There were people from the US, Germany, Argentina, Russia, Chile, Mexico, Switzerland, Austria, Taiwan and Ukraine.

My PC  shared life changing success stories on her Purification and Comm Course.  She and her dad flew all the way from Tucson Arizona to meet with Max and Erica and to enjoy the party and various activities in the LA area. 

Oleg and his wife helped throughout the day with the translations from English to Russian!

It was such a memorable event!  Notice all the smiles on their faces!  Scientology is fun again and we are all united and delivering auditing and training all over the world outside mass of the Church of Scientology!

This is a picture of some of the people who came to the party. Lots more people came as the day progressed and we all totally enjoyed building new friendships.

I must say, the room was FILLED with a lot of positive energy and more PURE THETA than I have seen in a very long time!

It was such a pleasure to have met these ladies! All of us auditors and OTs having fun!

Lots of sweet memories that we will all keep in our hearts for a very long time! Here are some shots of the day and some of the people that came to attend…



This couple delighted us with their beautiful dancing style

My husband David and I would like to sincerely thank all the people that came to join us this day and for their participation in creating a truly Theta and memorable event.  It was such a blessing to behold all the different cultures and the revitalization of our common purpose across the planet.  To see Scientologists from across the globe all free of the church, all  joined in the true spirit of Theta and comradery.





Thank you

David & Aida



~~~   ~~~
 My email adress:

Scientology: Rip offs, Scams, Complaints, Lawsuits and frauds

                              Carisa Marion’s Story


This is an account from Marisa to me when she came on a visit to my house and also from an article in the St Petersburg Times from Tampa, Florida.

Carisa Marion had more than $350,000 in her church account when “The Basics” went on sale. “Because I had this money there, I was a target for staff who actually stole money off my account many times for unauthorized book purchases”
 Said Carisa on a Knowledge Report.


When the ‘Basic Books’ were first released everybody was called, even people like me, who have left the Church fifteen years ago because of the rip off of the Golden Age of Tech.

SO members were endlessly calling anyone who had ever been on lines, all of the staff were ordered to sell the books, even HCO and the C/Ses!

My friend Carisa Marion has been a scientologist for more than 30 years, she is an expert on nutrition and the top authority in the planet with regarding the Purification R/D for the general public as well as for those addicted to drugs.

Her expertise is not only on the Purification R/D but is also on which vitamins and supplements to take for a specific body problem. She is the best.


Carisa owned a property near Flag and the Org wanted to buy it to own more real estate in Clearwater and in 2005, she was paid one million for it. However, they made her agree that $500, 000.0 0 was put back on account for Scientology services for her and her family.

When the Basics were released she bought three sets with some of the money for her family, nevertheless they tried to sell her more books and she refused, “no  more” she said. But they did not give up and late at night they came knocking on the door unexpectedly but she did not answer. Then later she was called by the captain of the org and was asked to buy the books for the mayor of the City of Santa Clarita, California where she lived. She again, said no.



A month later, she was called again, insisting that she buy the books and she finally gave in and they took $7,000 from her account and broke up her auditing package. She then went to Celebrity Center in Los Angeles for auditing and while she was there, she was asked to go to the Chaplains office, when she walked in there were three staff members who started harrassing her to buy sixteen sets of the basics!!!!


She had already bought five! And they wanted more! She had already written a Knowledge Report that she was being pressured to break her OT levels for books. She was told at Celebrity Center that if she bought 16 sets, other public were going to help her sell them. After five hours of pressure, she gave in.

The Church delivered the books that sat in her living room for months and no one to sell them. That took another $30,000.00 from her account


Clearwater Sea Org staffer Stephanie Bills tapped into Marion’s account a few days later, Carisa’s account statement shows. She pulled out $3,625 — without permission, she said — to pay for individual titles in the Basics series. Those books were sent to Carisa’s brother in New York City.

It was February 2008, seven months into the Basics campaign.

Carisa found out when her brother called saying: What are these? He already had those titles.

Stephanie Bills Flag Rep in New York


 When she complained, Carisa was then promised that the money was going to be put back on her account by the treasury Christine Revell, but it never happened. Instead, the ethics officer Jarrod Kelly phone her and told her that he would have UPS pick up eight flawed sets and deliver four new sets, plus an additional series of lectures that go with the Basics. He also would put $5,000 back into her account.

Carisa said okay, but she insisted the debit not go through until her sets were picked up.

That didn’t happen. Kelly debited  Carisa four sets and UPS delivered them to her. Now she had 20 sets, enough to open a book store!!!!!

It took a week of phone calls, but Carisa got the church to pick up all 20 sets and promise to restore her account for those debits.

What she didn’t learn until later: One day after proposing the swap, according to her account statement, Kelly debited another $15,000, without her okay, for four more sets that were to be donated back to the church to distribute!


By september, Jose and Jesus Marinez went over her account and asked her to buy more sets for a scientologist in Italy who had offered to sell them for her.

Personally I don’t know who came with the idea to have public buy books and have other public sell them, the staff must have been desperate or evil to come with such unusual solutions.

By now she has been asked to buy 4 dozen = 48 sets of the books, imagine! Carisa now asked to have a statement with a balance of her account faxed to her, she wanted to make sure that there were no mistakes and everthing was perfectly clar, howeve, when the fax arrived, it showed a balance of only $278,374.55, which was incorrect. They just added $70,000.00 to shut her up.

When she was shown a statement of her account she saw that JoseLuis Martinez had  taken off her account more than $50,000 for the 20 sets she refused to buy. So now that she was furious, she decided to write a Knowledge Report whcich she called “Financial Crimes”.

According to some ex staff, there have been so many irregularities, that some  SO staff have been selling books to dead parishioners! One case is that of

Lisa Hamilton, who supervised several departments while in the SO said that said she personally saw the officer, Jon Lundeen, and his deputies searching computers for such accounts. A Sea Org investigation determined that Lundeen debited five accounts!


After complaining many times, Carisa, she then received a letter from the Flag’s treasury chief apologizing:

“I want to reassure you this matter has been investigated,” wrote Christine Revell. She told Carisa that her account had been frozen again “so there can be no further unauthorized debits.”

The church eventually restored all the money improperly debited from her account, which stood at $399,161.81 at the end of last year. However she assigned them the Condition of Treason the lack of integrity from the staff.

Then they shamelessy lied lied and said that she had been expelled, the truth is that Carisa actually sent them a resignation letter instead and askef for her money back, she was at her wits end and she decided that she did not want anything to do with the CofS. 

She finally got her money back on Halloween Day.

                            Carisa and I at my house having a good time.


It took a lawyer, a report to the Better Business Bureau, going to the media and lots of wasted time dealing with Church officials, until she got her money back.

Thanks to Joe Childs, an excellent reporter for the St Petersburg Times, Carisa was helped with her refund. One can see more details about this story in the SP Times.

Rekindling Scientology; Training Outside the Church


I came to ASHO in the late  ’70’s with the dreams of becoming a Class VIII auditor.  Training then was considered the most important aspect of Scientology.  Everywhere you went people were co-auditing and all of your friends were a class something or other auditor.  People were having fun and actually going up the Bridge as  ASHO had about 700 people on the Briefing Course alone!  The place was bursting and people that were happy and winning.

I got in Scientology in Tijuana of all places.  I moved  there with my family because my father started  a job as a college professor at the new University and he was a founding member of the Faculty of Law.

At that time I was searching for spiritual truth when Helena Hurtado told me about Scientology.  I loved it because of the , “What is true for you…” principle.


Here is beautiful Tijuana. It was fun living there back in the 70’s.


I consider that in order to truly achieve spiritual freedom one must also get educated.  Not only in Scientology but in general, one must have knowledge. Just imagine the personal satisfaction of being able to help others when life seems harsh and you are able to do something about it. I still like the Tech, well, most of it.  I apply the Tech and I see that it works and I feel satisfied that at the end of the day I helped someone to change their life.

However,  Scientology training has become obsolete in the last fifteen years or so and a lot of people have  told me that it is impossible to become an auditor in the CofS,  because of the long runway and outside is not so easy either.  I say no,  instead there seems to be a renaissance on training outside the church and many a good souls are dedicating their lives to helping others.

~~~~~~      ~~~~~~


Center for Spiritual Research and its Applications


Silvia Kusada Class VI Auditor, OT VIII from Italy, has been delivering Scientology outside the Church.  Silvia speaks Italian, English and Spanish. She also has been traveling all over the world to deliver the OT levels. She is a fine example of what an auditor should be.



She has an OT center in Texas where she audits and helps those  OTs who have stopped Solo Auditing for one reason or another, to have wins again.  She is also doing research on the original work of LRH from the 1950’s when it all began.



Silvia and I share the same ideals and we have discovered that when many beings work together toward  a basic common goal, life becomes magic. Things align and very little effort is required. Silvia is like a sister to me and I trust her and love her very much.


Silvia and Aida

I want to say here that it had been said that Scientology did not help some people. True, but yet it saved some other people’s lives.  Scientology is NOT for everyone.  Each has to search their own spiritual path in different directions until they find it.

My point of view is that I have a lot of respect for my friends who are helping others and that is why I am making  this post on my blog to let others know that there is training outside the Church of Scientology.

~~~~~~      ~~~~~~


The Helen Chen Academy

In Los Angeles and Taiwan, the Helen Chen Academy is very successful, they have made a lot of auditors as well as clears. My friends Helmut Flasch and his wife Helen Chen also have successfully disseminated Scientology all over the world. They are both OT VIII and Helmut is from Austria and Helen from Taiwan.

Helen Chen

. Graduation day at Helen Chen’s Academy



I had the pleasure to attend many of Helen Graduation parties

~~~~~~      ~~~~~~


Max and Erica Hauri’s  Training Center in Bern

Training is not only being delivered in English, Italian, Spanish and Taiwanese.  Max and Erica Hauri are delivering the Tech in Switzerland and in Russia as well. They have a training Center in Bern.  Max delivers the LRH’s original Bridge up to OT III and also Captain Bill Robertson’s Tech as well.


This is what Max has to say

“The bad experiences made me quit my work and membership in the Scientology church. The good experiences motivated me to disseminate Scientology outside of the church”.

“I left the church at the end of 1983”.

“Together with my wife Erica, we built up our Ron’s Org. After six years, 1990, I joined as a fulltime auditor and staff member at our Ron’s Org”.

Here is Max with his family


“Bit by bit we established communication lines all over the world. Today we have a lot of friends from all over the globe, especially from the East European countries”.

“Everyone should be supported with education as to how to achieve success in life. For me Scientology is a union a lot of different wisdoms from a lot of old religions and philosophies. Hubbard brought them together in a form that every person can understand. He developed precious exercises and practices, which can help everyone to develop spiritually, and to make future lives better and more successful”.


Max has been my rock in difficult times and I admire him very much because he is what I envision of a true OT, pandetermined, granting beingness and high theta comm individual.


~~~~~~      ~~~~~~


Bob Mongiello, The Riverside Mission in California and “Scientology Muster”


The Riverside Mission in California, was once the biggest Scientology Mission in the world. The place was bustling with students and PCs under the direction of Bob Mongiello and many other wonderful staff. Then the destruction of the Mission Network took place and all of  the missions fell apart,  including the Riverside Mission.

Bob moved on, and he and his family continued expanding as OT’s  and teaching the principles of the Tech to his children, who have never set foot in a single CofS.  Yet, they are trained as well as very successful in life.  Bob and his then wife Joan Mongiello, raised a great family and never lost their purpose to help others too.

Bob Mongiello and I

Bob and others have recently formed a group called “Scientology Muster.”  The purpose  is to create a stronger group and gather all the Scientologists and people interested in Scientology. There is no Mission yet as it is only in it’s inception.  However, lots of people have seen his videos and have contacted Bob to join his group and pretty soon they are going to be training others.

Here is one of Bob’s videos:



A lot has happened in Scientology, good and bad. Some were helped,  some were not.  However, we all have to take the path that is meant for us.  But as well,  there will always be people like Silvia, Max, Bob, Helen and Helmut, and many others who will be there to help their fellow beings. And that we can all be thankful for.


My email address:



An Essay on Warfare by The Sniper


I was sent this article by my good friend who I call “The Sniper.” I decided to publish it because I thought it was very interesting. However, they are HIS opinions and although I may not agree with everything he has to says, I still wanted to share his thoughts with you.

A note regarding “Author Names.”  It shows that the post is “by Aida Thomas.”  That is an automated line that shows I am the one that created the post. Not the article itself.  In other words, it was my log in account that was used to hit the “publish” button.  If Michael had posted Snipers article for us, then the Author would show as “By Michael.”

So, even though the automated post creators name, the original Author remains the same.

I hope that you all like it.


~~~~~~      ~~~~~~


 An Essay on Warfare

By The Sniper

The day Mike Rinder decided to speak in public was the day where I saw myself forced to monitor his actions. It was the day when he opened Pandora´s box, where I was sitting, twiddling my thumbs and smiling.

You read or heard a few times the heroic sentence, “Constant and continual alertness is the price of freedom. Constant willingness to fight back is the price of freedom. There is no other price, actually.”  (Quote by Hubbard)

You probably never thought about the consequences. In order to fulfill the requirements of the quote you have to run an intelligence service. That’s why governments spend endless billions of dollars to monitor and investigate enemy activities. Intelligence is the second oldest business on the planet and it´s an absolute necessity in a crazy civilization. Believe it or not, it also applies to individuals.

Actually the ordinary citizen doesn’t waste even 10 seconds per day looking at life from an investigative or security view. The devil knows why.

The major issue of intelligence is PREDICTION. Having no prediction will lead into potential emergencies or dangerous situations. Try to drive a car blind or to navigate a ship through the oceans without weather forecast.

Suddenly unemployed?  You had no prediction. 

Prediction is closely connected to control. No prediction = no control over environment.  Prediction is essential to staying alive.


SS Minnow?

Thus, what enables the wise sovereign and the good general to strike, conquer and achieve things beyond the reach of ordinary men, is FOREKNOWLEDGE. (Sun Tzu,The Art of War)


The day OSA asked me for help was the day they also opened Pandora´s box and until today they are clueless to what happened afterwards. During the project I have been running, I recovered an incredible amount of Know-How in the field of intelligence and warfare. Even though, OSA did not waste five minutes to train me. A part of the know-how isn´t available at all on this rotten planet.

Its very old lost technology and the church philosophy is simply.  Everybody can do everything because everybody did every job somewhere back on the track.  True or not, I present to you the field of intelligence warfare, and that this operating base is fast suicide for those who walk into the lions den

Now, after all this,  lets get back to Mike Rinder. 


You probably noticed that so far there are no legal battles ongoing between the church and R&R.  Strange isn’t it? The church NEVER hesitated to do so, when fighting their “apostates.”


The reason for this is simply what is called in Scientology

“Mutual Out-Ruds.”


Rinder is “sitting“ on incidents which he has not spoken about yet. And its a really a good idea (for him) if he never will. He should keep his “Wild Cards” behind his back and never use them.  If he doesn´t operate this way, he will probably open other boxes that BOTH  HE AND THE CHURCH, do not want to face. Items of which that could develop into  disasters for both parties.

If he has not shut down his memory completely, then he is aware of what I am talking about and the church is also aware of it. I am aware of it and also choose to keep my cards close to my chest. Now it´s becoming a poker game and the strategic advantage for me is, that I am an invisible player.

I apologize that I can´t give you precise details about myself and the church activity I have been involved with in the past.  I hope it satisfies to know that I am not a US citizen.

By discovering the enemy’s dispositions and remaining invisible ourselves, we can keep our forces concentrated, while the enemy’s must be divided (Sun Tzu)

Intelligence, (which is an important aspect of war) is always superior to PR. (propaganda)   PR is perfect to call to arms, labeling opponents as “evil,” spreading misleading data, lies, truth or half truth´s, and to  influence opinion of individuals or groups.


Rinder, Rathbun and Miscavige are all “PR Men,”

Nothing More!

And, it seems they never understood the lesson that, PR never ever won any battles. Think of Fidel Castro. I consider him to be one of the most talented PR personality of the 20th century. I recommend you see the interviews Fidel granted foreign reporters.   He handled embarrassing questions in ways you won´t believe. It is stunning, stunning and more stunning. The reporters were speechless.

You listen to him, turn around to leave and you are convinced that Cuba is a perfect place. Fidel is able to sell refrigerators to Eskimos but even he knew,  (back in 1958 ) that he could not conquer Cuba just by PR-skills.   So, he joined Ernesto “Che” Guevara, a genius warrior with excellent knowledge and skills in guerrilla tactics and this was the end of General Batista in Cuba.


The way one defeats an enemy is to reduce his power about 80-90%.  The way that is done is either to drive his army into a situation where it becomes nonoperational, and/or you remove the Government or Generals from their posts.  The latter is more difficult to accomplish from outside than being an insider, and there are a lot of different ways how it can be done.


By the day (7/20/944) when Stauffenberg failed to kill Hitler, more people and soldiers lost their life until the end of the war in April 1945, than within the five years before. (since 1939).



Rathbun missed his chance to become the (Successful) “Stauffenberg of Scientology”

Sadly he did not even try.  Even though being closely connected to the “Führer,“  and knowing all the details of his organization, administration, legal, structure, operating basis, security and habits. Defeating an army on a battlefield is  extremely extensive as well as expensive. And, success is never actually guaranteed.  From within, is a different story.


Let me make one thing clear, Neither Rathbun nor Rinder are my targets.


 Until 2009 I had not even heard of Marty Rathbun though I have been in the church for 25 years. I knew Mike Rinder from his speeches on stage during the IAS events.


I considered the blow of both Rathbun and Rinderto be an out-point which is called in the Data Series policies,  “added time.”  If they were such evil scumbags, (as the church describe them in their blogs) and then hesitating for 25 years to fire them, it does not make sense. It also does not make sense to stay in the church and serving as a punching bag by choice for 25 years.

That,  was the string to pull that started my research.

Furthermore within the last 20 years I stored about two dozen outpoints regarding the Church and RTC activities, as it was not possible for me to find the data within the church in order to get everything resolved. 

I was fed up so I spent about 400 hours scanning the Internet.

I went through thousands of documents which are available and then had to separate the crap from the useful data to compile everything,  including  my own experience.

  • Sadly, I learned from the whistle blowers reports, that all the lies from “apostates” were not lies.

  • I learned that I ran a useless project by fighting the truth.

  • I learned that I backed up Miscavige´s ass, all his crimes and all the bullshit he did and does.

  • I also learned that they don’t give a shit about the wealth and health of their “loyal officers.“   It´s a gang of parasites and opportunists.

Intelligence has a quite bad reputation in public and it is considered to be a justice free area.  Although even in such arenas as this, there exist an unwritten codex, yet the Church and OSA violates them all.

Because I am not willing to monitor Rinders actions until he is passing away, I decided to do something about it. However its not obsessive. I must not play the game. Usually I would say it´s a useless war, which is not worth wasting two cents to become involved with. It also seems that LRH has no more interest in his “baby” as well.     The real question which should be asked is…

~CUI BONO ? ~ 

WHO  BENEFITS  of the quarrels ?

 But that’s not my issue.

So, I thought it´s time to look at the problems Scientology has,by looking from other relevant viewpoints.  The superior view of this article is warfare. Because, in fact we got one. The Church and their opponents.   Other views should also be taken, because it seems they are being ignored by both parties.

Lets start with the US Government. It is well known for and proud of,  200 years of showing the most liberal attitude towards religious beliefs. They are busy backing up Israels ass. And, their intelligence services are busy trying to isolate a handful of terrorists out of 1,5 billion Muslims.  (Have Fun) They are busy trying to save their insecure economy, resources and interests, either in or outside the US. (That’s their job)  Its a lot of work to do and all must be run and administered.

Do you really believe the Government Officials want to get deeply involved into the quarrels the church has with their ex-members?  Investigating a recognized religion which went completely  off the rails and turned into a strange cult?  Does anybody think they will check if Miscavige follows policy or not, whether he is altering tech, or wasting money?

Do you think they will investigate the suicide of Scientologists and try to connect the dots to their religious beliefs or evaluate disconnection policies and argue if its canceled or ~ contrary to LRH´s orders ~  reinstalled?

Do you think a politician, a member of the Congress or a Senator will argue about those matters? The government has REALLY other problems than paying attention to a handful of upset Ex-cult members.

Does anybody think the US Government and its authorities are questioning Jewish codes, behavior, attitude, way of life and history, because Bernie Madoff (a Jew) burned 60 billion Dollars of his investors money?


Why should they try to connect the dots of Rex Fowlers or Reed Slatkins faults to their religion ~ Scientology ?

Scientology whistle blowers are busy trying to convince the public, judges, authorities, media and politicians that something is wrong with the Church and Miscavige.

Yes you are right.  An OT8  should neither shoot his staff nor commit suicide. But that’s not the reality out there in the country’s main stream population.  There, its a usual thing that people, business man and home owners declare bankrupt or commit suicide. Its a pity but it happens. NON-Scientologists don´t have the slightest clue why it´s a “BIG OUTPOINT”  that OT’s do strange things.

Ex-Scientologists seem to be extremely introverted on the injustice they experienced in the church and then they ignore the reality and viewpoints existing in the so called “WOG-World” ~ The world outside the cult.

People die, even Scientologists die at the age of 16, 35, or 55.  Anything unusual?   The church can sell it to the public but you can’t sell them your view.

If you try to connect the dots of tech and policy with a Non-Scientologist,  you first have to clarify half  the tech dictionary, half the admin-dictionary, and then get them to read a bunch of policies bulletins and flag orders before you can even poise the first question.

Who would generate that amount of efforts by choice, yet not for there own personal spiritual interest? A few anonymous and sect experts have, as well as some judges beening forced to so they could understand the quarrels the Church is having with their Ex-members in the court room.

 I bet they hated it.


I recommend people read the article in Wikipedia about the Jewish writings called “Talmud.”  Specifically the chapter on “Attacks.“ 

You will find similarities between what is going on in the Co$ regarding its writings and the troubles the Jews have with the Talmud that have been ongoing for the last…



The legal battles.

The worst policy of all is to besiege walled cities. (Sun Tzu)

Lets look at barriers.   Barriers make a fortress.  Physically we got walls, fences and barbwire. The Int base is a fortress.   On an administrative level we got LRH policy.

If you analyze ethics and justice policy, you will find that it was set up in order to prevent destruction of the church and the tech from in – or outside.

This includes that a Scientologist can´t sue another Scientologist, while both are members of the church in good standing. Its a very special situation which does not exist (as far as I know) in other religious communities.

Internal troubles are being routed to HCO and if HCO fails, then OSA cares for it. The production lines are closed for entheta. (bad news)

Attacking policy, bylaws or alterations of those in public or court is equivalent of attacking fences and barbwire.


It´s the wrong target. 

An individual must be the target.  Always!


On a legal level you got the US constitution, laws and bylaws which back up Scientology as a recognized religion.

The US state department is still receiving reports of human rights abuses against Scientologists in other country’s. Do you think the State Department will accept reports from the department of justice and publish Human Rights violations committed in the US ? They do not even dream to do so.

They delegate cycles to their authorities, police, IRS, FBI..   In order to check if illegal actions have been committed, which is the only aspect they are interested in. Was it illegal or not. If yes, can it be proven without doubt?



You enter the police office and tell the officer;  “Miscavige has beaten me“

The officer thinks about his overloaded lines…

  • He has  five or more bodies in his morgue on any given day, some of which he scratched out of the sewage pipes and he is supposed to find their killers.
  • He  has dozens of thieves, dealers and prostitutes in his jail, making lots of noise and troubles and he has to handle them based on their required administrative procedures.

So, he stays tuned and asks, “Alright, when was it?”

You say; “five years ago.“ 

He says; “Sorry its time-barred.”

If it is not time-barred he says….


“OK, make up an affidavit, I will interrogate this Miscavige.”


He then receives five affidavits sent by the church saying the contrary.

Miscavige is a kind guy and has never beaten anyone.”

Now he has got cross data which results in no action at all.

Statement against Statement.    

File Closed.

This is the basic problem with all the reports coming out of the Int base/Flag/Ship or local Orgs. Affidavits (speaking in public and in court) hardly work.

In a court and especially in the US,  justice is achieved for those who have a lot of money. Even if you got enough money (Bob Minton) then you have to deal with the legal eagles and the complexity of the justice system.

Scenario 2

Another guy enters the Police Station and tells the officer;  “I had to do slave labor.”

The officer says; “You have to prove it. Consult an attorney and get witnesses.”

You meet with an attorney and describe the situation, he analyzes and says;

You have been bound by religious rules and where foolish enough to have signed a one billion year contract, without even knowing all the game conditions?”


The church is forwarding this strategy either in or outside the courtroom. If the attorney is a bull terrier and hates the church or believes in human rights he says;

“You have to make an advanced retaining payment of 10000 USD and I will check to see if I can find a way to sue the church.”

Scenario 3

Another walks in and tells the officer;  “All i had to eat for six months was rices and beans every day.”

He is looking at you and he thinks; 

This guy is still alive, he looks quite good.   Then he remembers a media report that in third world countrys,  15000 kids die of starvation every dayAnd says,

“I bet they would kiss your feet in the starving nations if you provide those rice and beans every day for six month.

Yet, we feels sympathy and he says; “Here s a dollar,  go buy a Big Mac.


Scenario 4

Another tells him: “I had to run around a pole for 12 hours in the desert sun.“

The officer thinks, Obviously he came through it all right and he should probably apply for the International Iron-man Triathlon Contest.

So he says; “It seems it was not illegal, but you are free to contact Amnesty International. Maybe they can help you.



A police officer or prosecutor upon hearing about allegations looks to find a string for investigating illegal church actions.

He is looking into Marty’s blog reading a sentence saying;   “In 1984 I was on a mission with the D/CO OSA WUS and we met the I/O OSA Int…” 


So, he closes the blog page and says,  “What the hell are they talking about?  No Thanks!”  He would rather open the homepage of  something he understands, Like PLAYBOY.


You see almost all of those blogs and Internet-sites violate AXIOM 28. They communicate to Scientologists only! The Scientologists  “special language“ is knocking off every potential ally from the outside.

 When you engage in actual fighting, if victory is long in coming, then men’s weapons will grow dull and their ardor will be damped. If you lay siege to a town, you will exhaust your strength. (Sun Tzu)



The PR battles

Whenever communication fails and it seems impossible to accomplish justice, the operation base is turning into;  SPEAKING in public and revealing the truth about…    (also known as PROTEST PR) You find this game all over the planet.

  • CCHR is revealing the truth about psychs.
  •  Amnesty international is revealing the truth about human rights violations.
  • Revisionists are „revealing the truth“ about the holocaust.
  • Media are revealing the truth about environmental destruction, about bankers, wars and governments.
  • The 9/11 movement is revealing the truth about 9/11………
  • Arnie and Gerry are revealing the truth about Hubbard and of course Rathbun, Headley, Hall, and Rinder are revealing the truth about Miscavige.

They are convinced about THEIR MISSION and try to hammer it into the mind of parishioners, the ordinary citizen, politicians, organizations, media, prosecutors, judges and government authorities in order to get agreement that something must be done about it.

By doing so they run into all sorts of barriers; Ignorance, apathy, spectatorship, unconsciousness, altered importance, stupidity, complex justice systems, confusions, misunderstood, identification, upsets, (legal) nit-picking, counter intentions and, and and…

The 9/11ers were hammering their heads against the government walls, again and again for 10 years. Did they change the governments attitude?

I bet the Chinese government is just laughing about Amnesty International Human Rights reports.


There is nothing wrong blowing the whistle. Its just a question of time until you change/reform something. If you review worthily activities to reform a bad situation you will find the following; It takes years, decades or centuries.

Examples: Slavery in the US (M.L.King), Apartheid in South Africa (Nelson Mandela), democracy in Europe, independence from the British Empire in India (Ghandi)

 The church AND their “apostates“ are continuously hammering “The truth about…“  against a wall of lies, or hammering lies against a wall of truth. I don´t care what the actual scene is.

For me the key point is, How many “soldiers“ do I have to face? How much enemy resources? How many  weapons? What level of skills or ability and what strategy? And, can I isolate a weak point which can be used to cause them a lost the battle?

I am simply challenging you to make up an appropriate estimation of effort, that’s all.


In respect of military method, we have, firstly, Measurement; Secondly, estimation of quantity; Thirdly, calculation; Fourthly, balancing of chances; Fifthly, Victory. (Sun Tzu)


So in war, the way is to avoid what is strong and to strike at what is weak.(Sun Tzu)


Religious belief in itself is one of the most stable and unshakable fortress you can find. Try to hammer into the mind of Scientologist that Scientology is a scam, Miscavige is a squirreling crook, Hubbard a liar or the tech does not work.

They just laugh and walk away. Even if they are not aware that they receive just 50 % standard tech, they are still winning. You wanna argue away all his wins, invalidate his knowingness ?   Forget it.

Try to convince a Muslim that pork won´t make him sick die. He won´t eat it. He sees every day that Christians don’t die by eating pork.  Do you wanna argue about it ?   Forget it !

During the middle ages, the catholic church had been committing incredible crimes. (inquisition) Heretics and disbelievers have been chased and harassed, killed, burned. The catholic church even went off the rails when psychotic popes reached their highest rank, but they still  EXIST.   (since 2000 years)

During his “European Tour 1939-45“ scumbag Hitler had nothing better to do than chase and harass the Jews. The result?    They still exist and Hitler is rotting  in hell.   (I hope so)


Martin Luther was fed up and established the Lutheran church. He showed the Vatican his ass, but did not try to fight them.  (quite clever I think)   He reformed the rules and went on with his game. The Lutheran church is still there, although they have been chased and harassed at least for 200 years by the Vatican.

Therefore I consider church activities to destroy splinter groups to be Dev-T and won´t be successful. Wasted time, wasted resources. I actually do not understand this obsessive attitude to destroy “squirrels”.

If squirrels (regardless if they actually squirrel or not) are happy to mess up their cases, developing and practicing other tech then it´s great. The church should grant them the right to do so. They are defeating themselves.

Twiddle your thumbs and smile. I wait for the day when they start massacring Buddhists, because their spiritual practice is a squirrel activity.

Now,  it is predictable that the church and their opponents won´t get anywhere. This is confirmed by the fact that all major Scientology “enemies“ are still there and acting to a certain degree, at least for three decades and it is very interesting that almost none of them went to jail because of “crimes.“  HA, I estimate more Scientologists (in good standing) went to jail than critiques.

The church also exists yet. Sadly, as I analyzed the church is in a better position yet. They are sitting inside the fortress labeling every attacker a “religious hate monger.“  Yet, Rathbun is standing outside with a few dollars in his pockets and shouting, “I am your Waterloo“ and then continuously shooting artillery against their walls, fences and barbwire. What is he going to do when he has no more ammunition left? What then when he gets done revealing all the faults and crimes of Miscavige from every single day during the the last 30 years?

Revealing data which is are verifiable a weak point is stupid. The church will be able to destroy all incriminating evidences.

Something should be done with the data, but UNDER THE SUREFACE.   What needs to be prepared is a 9/11 for the church. You remember the definition of power? Power is defined as; knowing others withholds.  (LRH)


Masking power with weakness is a basic tactical consideration (Sun Tzu)


It seems Marty´s ammunition store is already quite empty and his blog is actually turning into a hate machine. The game of “Telling the truth about…“ has been left and developed into a childish show with extensive use of scatology.  Its worse than what you can find in a nursery.

Do not think I am defending or endorsing church actions. The church blogs are also worse than garbage. To get a little bit release from this fight I recommend you read the blog of Jeff Hawkins.


I love his factual reports, his analysis and his evaluations. You do not find any bad emotion there, he is simply communicating the truth and its fun to read it.

Same applies to Aida Thomas blog. She has got a big heart and honest intention. A grateful acknowledgment from me that she published my article.



And now let’s settle with the church

Noisy invest and harassment in public went off the rails. They act like bulls in the china shop. And, they make sure everybody can see WHAT A RUTHLESS COMPANY THE CHURCH is!

Their stupid assumption is, that they create respect and warn (potential) attackers to criticize the church.  Judge for yourself. Review the last 40 years. Did it work?   I say no, the noise about the church is getting louder and louder and louder.

Hitler attacked all European countries. Did he create respect for Germany on long term view?  Never ever !

Did Spain create respect in South America by attacking and robbing indigenous peoples? Never ever! They have hated the Spanish for 400 years. And it doesn’t matter what PR-line has been used to justify the actions.




I know for sure, that several European governments (including Russia) have been investigating, monitoring and recording OSA activities. Sure they filed whistle blower reports. But they confirmed it by doing their own job. OSA is completely underestimating different government activities because they are carried out SILENTLY and invisible.

And maybe one day in the future if a miracle happens and a Church PR gets a date with a government official in order to REMOVE or CLARIFY FALSE REPORTS about the church, the following might happen.

Official: “Well thank you for giving me a copy of  “What is Scientology.“  Let me show you something. Here is our archive.  As you can see we gathered all the writings of your founders  -HCOPL’s HCOB’s Flag Order’s, Odd’s, CBO’s and lectures since 1950. We kept complete track of all changes, revisions and alterations. We also established a task force to evaluate the data.

And just to pick up a cross datum we cannot think with.

From our perspective, the Co$ has demonstrated that neither your religious credo nor the essay “What is greatness“ applies or is being applied to apostates, critiques and whistle blowers and so confirmed that the policy “Fair Game“ and  related confidential Flag Orders have been in full use since its alleged cancellation in 1968.

Furthermore we noticed that Mr. Hubbard wrote a few really biting and broadly generalized comments about governments which we don’t appreciate.  Especially here in the older versions of the finance series policies. Now let me show YOU a video.”

HE will then be shown a video highlighting all the bullshit the church has organized in order to chase and harass Robert Vaughn Young, Stacy Young, Bob Minton, Jesse Prince, Joe Cisar, Stephen Kent and Gerry Amstrong amongst many many others

Official;  “Here you see a member of your local church spitting on  Stacy Young. His name is….    Here you see a cheep privet investigator chasing and filming your “apostates“ by using a rental car. He came with the same plane and left with the same plane as Bob Minton.

Here are copies of his passport and his flight tickets. And by the way, in our country it is illegal to use a camcorder while driving a car.

Here you see five church members standing around Mrs. Caberta screaming and yelling, accusing her of being  a Nazi.  FALSE REPORTS ?  Thank you for listening, there is the exit door. USE IT!“

Governments do not forget. Once data is filed it stays in the files and it is never removed.  If in 100 years a politician will hear about Scientology, looking at the videos and reading a short summary of a strange cult that existed in 2011 , he might think…

Good thing Miscavige destroyed it !“

OSA did not learn its lessons. Neither in PR nor in Investigations and Iintelligence.  OSA is just a gang of erring dabblers. Every attempt to destroy an enemie must be prepared and done under the surface. Period.  No exception.

Fair Game is Absolutely Out Reality for the Rest of Society.

Therefore all policy and orders written by LRH must be canceled. Because, it is proven that they DO NOT WORK!!   And, stop this stupid PR-line saying;  “We have the right to defend ourselves.”

Sure, spitting on people solves lots of problems.

Possible solutions

First, one must determine what he wants to achieve.  Do you really Want to  get rid of the church?

Great, then listen carefully. Here is the solution for all those who hate religion, cults, Hubbard, the church, the tech and for those who quite  and decided to never come back.

Since 2004 at least two dozen Int-execs and staff have left the church and spoke out. All of them confirmed that Miscavige is destroying the church from inside.  Isn’t that good news for you ?


After fighting the church for two or three decades from the outside, we now realize that Miscavige is working hard on Scientology’s meltdown from within! Imagine, he is doing your work for you!  He is going to accomplish what you tried to accomplish.  Let him go at it,  he is a professional in destruction.

You can’t do it better from the outside, so why continuously hammer your head against the walls of the fortress? You have been wasting money and efforts, you had to endure the OSA harassment, legal threats and all sorts of filthy shows.

Now you became aware of all the unnecessary DEV-T you created yourself.  Even if you have been paid for it, was it worth all the terror? Now you can sit back in your comfortable chair Twiddle your thumbs, drink a beer and smile.  From time to time you open Marty´s blog and monitor the number of parishioners which have been scared away from the church. 

If you think you need more action or randomity,  organize a party in Hemet near the Int Base.




Or, prepare some banners saying Miscavige, we love you, you are a genius. Keep going altering the tech, waste more money, keep ruining parishioners , drive them crazy and bankrupt. We enjoy empty ideal orgs and disconnected families.

Keep going Miscavige. YOU ROCK! 

(Theta becoming a Solid Mass. ROCK!)


 That’s a quite smart attitude from a viewpoint of warfare.  No efforts necessary to win your battle. The enemy makes sure he defeats himself. Furthermore you drive the nasty rat and his gang into confusion because he does not expect such a reaction and he won’t be able to work out a handling, as there is nothing there to  handle.  You are just sitting calmly clapping your hands.

Therefore the skillful leader subdues the enemy’s troops without any fighting. He captures their cities without laying siege to them and he overthrows their kingdom without lengthy operations in the field. (Sun Tzu)

For all others who are concerned about the church and the legacy of LRH, the above sounds sarcastic, bold and maybe 1.1.   If you feel upset then please realize it was not addressed to you.  It´s just suggestion to operate on a reverse flow.

Furthermore the above operation basis will cause more and more collateral damage. If this is not desirable, then the process of the church deconstruction must be speed  up.

Those who do not wanna fight in public should keep delivering service. One can run an independent course room or deliver spiritual counseling. This was Scientology’s original plan. Creating more theta on the planet, ignoring and bypassing all the troubles and Entheta the planet has.

The more theta that is  released the more the environment (planet) will automatically change for the better .

For those who are not tech trained you could also do what I do. If you walk through the streets, you will find lonesome old people sitting all day at the window looking around or hobbling to the next supermarket. Contact them and ask them,  “Can I help you with something?”  And then help them. Visit with them, listen to them, Acknowledge them.

 They have probably not had real communication in years. Nobody to give them an ack or cared what they had to say.  I guarantee it,  you will  earn really honest gratefulness.  And, change a life.

Beside this,  you could make a postulate that Miscavige disappears from his post.  (soon)  Who knows what will happen?  Maybe half a dozen sharks chase and harass him  while he is diving and finally ripping off his ass.  As far as I know, hungry sharks also eat carrion.  


Protest should be strengthened and Marty Luther and the anonymous army should keep making a lot of public noise. Yes, we need more of it in the public view, but the purpose is simply to keep OSA busy by distracting their attention.  The petition is a good starting point and we will see if Obama will move his ass. (don’t hold your breath though)


Another possible action is the operating basis of Mathma Gandhi, but can be executed only inside the church. Ghandi defeated the British Empire by refusing to work for them. As an opinion leader for the Indians they followed his orders. Simply a mutiny. The British administration broke down.

This applies to public, staff and especially sea Org members. The more guys that blow, the faster the shop is broken.

A call to mutiny for Int base staff and Sea Org members is needed. Distributing flyer’s would help. 

If there is disturbance in the camp, the general’s authority is weak. If the banners and flags are shifted about, sedition is afoot. If the officers are angry, it means that the men are weary. (Sun Tzu)


“ARE YOU FED UP WORKING 100 hours per week for nothing?  Then stop working and walk out. Even following a grand purpose, You still have  civil rights.“

Or a similar text, push buttons !! You know them better than I!

One could get a small plane pulling a big banner after and circle above the INT base. Or use an airship

YOU ARE FED UP? JUST WALK OUT !! Freedom is awaiting you !!

And now a message TO OSA Executives at the INT base!!

Create an internal conspiracy. Knock off every policy/FO you ever studied. “Currently you do not follow command intention….”

NO, you are following the intention of a nasty rat, a ruthless bandit.  Stop thinking in terms of conditions and policy. Start thinking in terms of US laws and human rights.


STOP WORKING, JUST WALK OUT. You are free to do so.

Its covered in constitutional rights. These are not canceled for you. Even if you herd it thousand times. If a security is threatening you with a pump gun just say, “If you pull the trigger you go to jail 25+ years. And that’s a lots of dicks there are waiting for your ass.

You are guilty of false imprisonment.“ Tr3, Tr3. Hold your position, and go !!!

If someone is assigning you a condition, then tell him. “You can stick your condition in your ass, good bye for ever.“

You think you are committing a high crime called mutiny? Bullshit, knock it off.

The only high crime is to keep working for a psychotic leader who runs a chicken shack, called Church of Scientology.


Another way to break DM´s neck is the following:

To destroy the credibility of affidavits saying Miscavige has never beaten anybody one must make up a secret recording – a video – filming Miscavige doing so. 5 seconds, or better 10.

Almost all modern mobile phones are set-up for making videos. Or you get mini DV cam which is masked as lighter. Lighters are perfect for your purpose. You can buy that stuff on ebay. Then post the video on You tube !!

Even if it seems impossible, try it. Miscavige can´t cut all comm lines to prevent this. The more comm lines he is cutting the more power he looses. That’s what we want.

It is important that these ideas will infiltrate/infect the minds of the staffs and the result will be that none trusts the other mate.  If the crew is weak and already demoralized then its a breeding ground for those ideas. The best what could happen is that Miscavige gets this sheet on his desk. It will drive him crazy, hopefully PTS Type 3.

 To secure ourselves against defeat lies in our own hands, but the opportunity of defeating the enemy is provided by the enemy himself. (Sun Tzu)

In all fighting, the direct method may be used for joining battle, but indirect methods will be needed in order to secure victory. (Sun Tzu)


I have been analyzing and evaluating Miscavige’s set-up, forth and back, up and down.  X-times.  It seems the administrative and organizational system which protects him is perfect. Fortunately a few days ago I found a weak point, a small gap in the walls of his fortress.

Within the next few weeks I will inspect it and look if there are any traps inside the gap. Regardless of the circumstances, I already worked out a plan to focus and direct “special forces“ into it.

Now, the good news is, If he finds the gap he can´t close it.  It follows that he can´t prevent the plan even if it  has been revealed. Its already too late.

The weak point of my plan is, that I need the cooperation of the “special forces.“  I will see if I can get it done.  (And No, I will not send John Rambo there )

Hence, that general that is skillful in attacks, up0ne whose opponent does not know what to defend; and he is skillful in defense, whose opponent does not know what to attack.


Yes  Miscavige;  And now a special message for YOU

Too many punishments betray a condition of dire distress. (Sun Tzu)

PS: Public Scientologist in good standing should make up a PR-disaster for Miscavige. My message is adressed to those who are flying under the radar or disaffected. During the next major events, throw rotten eggs and tomatoes onto stage while Miscavige is speaking. Grant him what he deserves.

As the Americans say… “Toss him under the bus!”


 The Sniper


.Dear friends, I got this incredible historical record from the the Captain of the Athena and the Apollo, the first ships that LRH commanded back in the 60’s, you are going to love this story as it is the best one of them all, and I want to share it here in my blog. This is from a person that was there when it all happened.

Aida Thomas, October 2011

                                     Welcome aboard!

By Joe Van Staden who served as Captain of the Athena and the Apollo at various times.

Undoubtedly the story of how it all began has been told more than once – each time from a different perspective no doubt.   In the following account of my personal involvement in the birth of the SO I hope to provide a perspective which may shed some light on later developments within and around that organization.

My first contact with Scientology was in Johannesburg (1960).   There I met L Ron Hubbard for the first time when he came out to South Africa to run the first South African ACC.    Toward the end of 1962 I went over to St Hill UK to do my SHSBC.    In 1965 I did my class 7 course after which my wife Jill and I joined staff at St Hill.    At some point LRH mysteriously disappeared from St Hill.   As we found out later he had left for Las Palmas.

Most people on staff and on course at St Hill in the early and mid 60’s would agree; it was idyllic.    It was a meeting place for likeminded people – people who could not find what they were looking for in life through conventional institutions and teachings.    St Hill prospered.   I believe that period has even been referred to as the golden age or something like that.

It was very easy to just BE and not be concerned as to how you were being.  For instance, there was no ethics officer ready to pounce on my friend for doing his yoga exercises out on the lawn at St Hill.    Nor was there any reason to think that that might happen.    The typical molded org persona, with all its heaviness, which became so prominent in later years, just wasn’t there.

How did this seriousness come about?    In the simplest of terms; when did the “spirit of play” go out of being on staff and was it necessary to stop having fun while in pursuit of greater awareness?   Perhaps I can offer a feasible perspective on that.

One day several senior St Hill staff members were approached by Joan Thomas.    At that point I was Qual sec and my wife Jill was either Dissem sec or HCO at the time.   A bunch of us were recruited into the Sea Project and told to get our sailing skills in order.    So, once a week off we went to the south coast and had our sailing lessons.      It was fun and we also did learn to sail – somewhat.

Several weeks passed and came the day the group was bundled onto a bus and taken to Hull in the north on the Humber River.  By this time we knew we were joining a ship but had no idea what to expect.   As the bus entered this particular section of the harbor we saw her.    Listing about 10 degrees, rusted and battered, there she was; the Avon River – a North Sea fishing trawler pushed to her limits by her previous owners.   I looked at my fellow passengers.  For a moment there was stunned silence.   Then a kind of confused nervous laughter started spreading around the bus.   Was it excitement, I don’t think so.    I think at that instant it was more a case of; What the F….. is this?

 For various reasons, at times I will refrain from using the full names of some of my old shipmates and instead just use initials. 

 Anyway we settled in.   The temporary captain was FM; he and two others had been aboard prior to our arrival.

Without much delay the crew was put to work cleaning and getting the boat ready for sea.    Keep in mind the Avon River was a fishing boat – her decks were covered in about 2 inches of solid petrified fish oil, all of which had to be scraped off.   For several weeks we worked long hours but as far as I can remember, not a single crew member lacked in enthusiasm and commitment.   In the evenings we worked on our seamanship check-sheets – it was a long day.     And tired as we were when we hit our bunks late at night, nothing could dampen our spirits and anticipation of what lay ahead.    Well, maybe at times the grey damp Hull weather got to us.

If my memory serves me right the Avon River had room for 140 tons of fish in her hold, which now was filled with all sorts of bits and pieces scavenged from other derelict boats.    To this day I don’t know what LRH wanted to do with it.    The stuff was later dumped in Las Palmas.

Initially we were to tow a barge filled with even more of this “junk”.    Fortunately that Idea was dropped.    Looking back and recalling some of the weather we had to contend with on our trip, I can’t imagine us managing to tow a barge all the way to Las Palmas.

 While in Hull we did some real live docking and undocking drills.    This picture should suffice to get across what most of it was like.   Imagine the Key Stone cops as would be sailors, falling all over each other as the boat rammed up against the concrete dock, snapping mooring lines and breaking anchors.    As they say; you had to be there.

Eventually the day of departure arrived.    Originally the idea was that the trip be done without any non-scientologist help.   In the end however, LRH thought better of it.    He told us to hire a professional captain and a professional chief engineer for the trip, which we did    By the way, the chief engineer arrived in a taxi motherless drunk minutes before our departure and had to be carried aboard.

Sailing down the East coast of England something broke in the engine room forcing us to pull into Harwich.   It’s possible that this was simply a ploy by the chief engineer to go ashore – probably to buy booze.    Anyway, repairs done we headed south.     Up to then the weather had been kind, but shortly after leaving Harwich Neptune decided to introduce himself properly.

Most of the crew, myself included, had never seen anything like this – mountains and valleys of green sea.    The propeller kept coming out of the water.    Perhaps someone who was there will say that they were the exception, but as far as I know everyone including the hired captain was sea sick.

Gradually the wind eased and our trip along the south coast of England became quite pleasant.    At Falmouth we had to pull in and refuel for the long stint to the Canary Islands.   Something went wrong during fueling and the black bunker fuel began to spill all over the decks.    Fortunately we prevented too much of the stuff spilling into the harbor.    It was during this episode that the tension between the hired captain and the temporary Scientologist captain came to a head.    FM packed his bags and left the boat.

By the time we got well into the Atlantic we had this wonderful gentle following swell and no wind.        Most of us very soon got our sea legs and began feeling really at home on the bounding main.


The choice that can not be escaped

Perhaps this is a good  point to deviate and express my admiration and respect for my fellow crew members as well as comment on a particular observation.

During all of those early years, no matter the conditions: be it taking on the most extreme weather or having to deal with some other dangerous situation, I never worried that we wouldn’t be able to see it threw.    Some of the guys and gals may at times have been scared shitless, but I never saw it in the performance of their duties.    Some skeptics will say we weren’t aware of the danger we were in, we were naïve – we were blinded by our faith in the “powers” of LRH or our belief in past lives gave us a false sense of immortality or, we thought with several clears aboard we were safe, or whatever.   Be that as it may, I am grateful for having shared some crazy adventures with some extraordinary people.

A significant factor behind the creation of the SO was to develop effective cohesive teams committed to The Cause.    Running ships provide an ideal environment for this purpose.   However, traditionally crews of ships and teams involved in extraordinary ventures naturally bond and camaraderie becomes commonplace.    Hence, the age old problem faced by leaders of religious, political, military and other similar type organizations throughout history: How to get the crew – the team – the followers, to first and foremost, above all else, be loyal to The Cause.   No doubt this topic can turn into a lengthy discussion, but let’s cut a long story short.

Two schools of thought are particularly relevant here.     There is the one that says when it really comes down to it – when all hell breaks loose – the troops are motivated to stand their ground and hold their position based on the bond they have with their comrades.   In other words, in the trenches ordinary soldiers first and foremost fight for each other.    Then there is the school of thought which claims that in the heat of battle the most effective outfit is one where the troops fear their own officers more than the enemy.

Where the bond between people is the telling factor the top brass is inclined to see total commitment to The Cause as being undermined by too close a connection between friends and family.   Hence, throughout history instilling fear of those in command has been adopted more often than not.   And as is clear to ex SO members, the latter is SOP in the SO.   But this wasn’t always the case.    Imagine refusing a direct order from LRH because of a bond with the crew.   In the early days a captain of the Athena was ordered by the commodore to com-ev his entire crew.   He refused and was gladly com-eved instead.   It is undoubtedly incidents such as this which contributed to the development of the current SO modes operandi, which first and foremost demands total loyalty and commitment to The Cause.

Here is the thing; whatever the reason for choosing The Cause above friends and family the top brass will expect every SO member to have made the right choice.    The point here is not that one choice is better than the other; the point is that there is no escape from having to choose.     The best an SO member can hope for is to never be pushed into having to make a choice and then having to act on it.     But as we know many have been forced to act on the choice between The Cause on the one hand and friends and family on the other.


Back to the original story  

On arrival in Las Palmas the two hired professionals were immediately put on a plane back to the UK.   Within a day or so of our arrival the boat was hauled up on the slips and local Spanish work teams began the refit.    At the time L Ron Hubbard was living in a Villa outside Las Palmas accompanied by some household staff.    We also opened an office in town with a couple of locals as staff.

As part of the refit the boat was sandblasted from top to bottom and stem to stern, during which time the crew remained living onboard.     And it was also during this time that it became obvious that LRH was beginning to experiment with some new lower ethics conditions.    For instance, Roger Buckeridge and I were the first two people ever to be put in the newly formulated condition of non-existence.   There was no condition lower at that time.    As part of our formula application we shoveled the mountain of sand left by the sandblasters off the ship.     Still, in spite of these developments the general atmosphere was light and at times even festive.

At that time the day to day relationship between LRH and the crew was inclined to be determined more by nautical tradition and sailor behavior than by The Cause of clearing the planet.    For instance; John O’Keefe, Jill and myself on a visit to the villa one evening were asked by LRH what we would like to drink.   John said he would have a scotch, Jill a glass of wine and I said a brandy.    The old man turned to Yvonne Gillham who was his personal steward at the time and said; get John a bottle of scotch, Jill a bottle of wine, Joe a bottle of brandy and me a bottle of rum.    Yvonne dutifully complied.     No, we didn’t finish our bottles, but we all did pretty well.    And yes, the rum in LRH’s bottle was real.

The old man has been known to use this ploy to loosen people’s tongues and get them talking about stuff regarding the crew and boat.

It was in the early hours of the morning when the three of us got into the car to drive back to the ship.    After several attempts the car just wouldn’t start, obviously it needed to be push started.   Insisting that the three of us remain in the car LRH put his back to it and pushed us at least 20 meters before we got going.   I can’t exactly recall what we talked about that evening but it certainly wasn’t about the evils of booze.

During the stay in Las Palmas there were many really funny and memorable episodes, some of which I am sure has already been told by people who where there.   Many an evening a bunch of us would sit out under the stars sipping the best duty free cognac while discussing a wide range of topics.    Speculation on what we would do once the refit was complete was rife.   (Las Palmas was a duty free port, hence the duty free cognac)

A clue as to the direction the Sea Org was heading was provided one evening during a visit by LRH to the ship.   He announced that it was time the Sea Org came out of non-existence – it was time to make an impact on the orgs out there beginning with St Hill.    It was mission time.      The first mission’s purpose was mainly to assert and affirm SO authority and presence.   As it turned out the three members of this first SO mission was my wife Jill, Fred Payer and me.

.                            The first SO mission arrives at St Hill     


 Arriving from Las Palmas, before walking into St Hill, Jill, Fred and I changed into our SO uniforms and made our dramatic entrance as intended by LRH.   The incident of me going into the manor monkey room and sticking the dagger into the ceiling is described by Bent Corydon in his book; Messiah or Madman.

To tell the truth, this dagger thing was a bit embarrassing for me, I didn’t share L Ron Hubbard’s leaning toward the theatrical.

During the mission Reg Sharpe was removed from post.     Up to then he had been LRH’s right hand man.   Reg left and with him his girlfriend, Jenny Edmonds.   Where they SP’s?   Of course not.   It was the missions brief to get rid of anyone who in any way questioned the authority of the Sea Org – there was to be no doubt about the SO’s powers and position at the top of the ladder.   And as has been confirmed since, the mission was a success.


A note on the concept of SP  

  At the time of the first SO mission I only suspected but later became convinced that SP declares were as much a political tool as anything else. 

In the bigger scheme of things it had less relevance to an individual’s case.   

Sure, there are anti-social characters running around, but let’s face it; by no stretch of the imagination did Reg Sharpe and Jenny Edmonds along with hundreds of other declared people fit the definition of SP as described in policy.

During my stint as director of review at St Hill, before the SO came into being, LRH was doing research on SP and PTS.    At that time this data wasn’t seen as an ethics issue – it was a purely tech matter.   With LRH wearing the hat of case supervisor and me an auditor several new procedures were tried out – such as S and D (search and discovery).    I recall the blunted purpose factor being identified as a main contributing factor to SP behavior.     From there procedures developed.    Anyway as it turned out, attempts to handle “troublesome sources” in Scientology through tech weren’t working and ethics action was resorted to.   What was originally a Qualifications Division function was replaced by ethics.   In effect the review auditor was replaced by the ethics officer.    Some would argue that ethics tech was a natural development born out of better understanding of human nature.   I disagree.

Confirmation of my views on SP data as a political tool came one evening while in conversation with LRH over dinner aboard the Athena.   I can assure you, conversations with the old man were never boring.     He told me that there were basically two types of people in organizations; the pioneering type and those who consolidate.     For those in charge, there was a time and place to use the pioneers and a time and place to bring in the consolidators.    As throughout the ages, when new territory needed to be opened up only the pioneers are effective, but once the land has been tamed it was necessary to bring in the consolidators.    It was a case of bringing order – introducing laws and policy – setting parameters for behavior – curbing further pioneering activity within the established territory.   That’s what consolidators do.

Here is an interesting thought; from the perspective of a typical pioneer; a consolidator is likely to appear suppressive and from the perspective of a dedicated consolidator the “uncontrollable” pioneer can easily be perceived as suppressive.    It’s simply a matter of perspective.  .

Some may prefer terms like innovative creative types and administrative management types rather than pioneers and consolidators.  

Consolidation of territory gained, invariably presents a problem; what to do with the pioneers once they have done their thing.    Retire them?   Relocate them?   Put them on ice until needed again?    If you have been around Scientology organizations for some time you will have become aware of the favored method – use ethics to get those who have established the existing structure out the way.  This also serves as a way of dampening their pioneering spirit until needed again – this idea doesn’t work so well in practice.    There have been several occasions when, according to LRH, a particular organizational structure in Scientology passed its use by date.    New structures had to be put in place, which meant the old had to be dismantled – personalities and all.    More about this later.


                                                        Back to the story

Anyway as the first SO mission to St Hill came to an end Jill and Fred were recalled to Las Palmas and I was sent on another mission.    My orders; go to Glasgow Scotland and buy another ship for the SO.   On arrival at the ship brokers I met a Mr. Scott.    Since a ship; the Royal Scotsman had already been identified as a possibility by Otto Roos, my task was reasonably straight forward.      So, after having checked out the ship and a price agreed on, Mr. Scott and I shook hands and the deal was done.   Or so I thought.   On phoning our lawyer DT at St Hill, asking him to send the check, all I got from him a couple of days later were a 10 page document to be signed by the brokers.   This inevitably resulted in lawyers on both sides getting involved and doing what lawyers do.    I think it was close on two weeks after Mr. Scott and I shook hands and still the lawyers had not settled the matter.   It was then that I called DT and told him, send the check or else!    I receive the check and handed it to Mr. Scott.   The 10 page document wound up in the trash can and I took possession of the ship for the SO.

Part of the deal was that a delivery crew was to take the ship to Southampton.    My immediate dilemma was to familiarize myself with the ship as much as possible during the trip south.    In size and complexity she was certainly a step or two up from the Athena. I needed help, so I got in touch with St Hill and recruited Ron Pook and an Australian.    Quite frankly I can’t recall the details of how exactly I got hold of these two guys.   Anyway between the three of us we would keep our eyes open to pick up any relevant information about the ship.

After several days at sea we arrived at Southampton.    The gangplank had hardly hit the dock and the delivery crew was gone.    Bemused and bewildered the three of us looked at each other – what now?     Do we know enough to take care of this big bucket of bolts until who knows when?   While still contemplating what the worst was that could possibly happen, it happened.    From the dockside some official looking gentleman shouted that we can’t stay were we where, we had to move to the other side of the harbor.

Now, Southampton just happens to be one of the busiest  ports in the world, with huge ships coming and going all the time     Was the three of us expected to take the ship across all that traffic and safely moor her on the other side?     To begin with, starting up the massive Burmeister and Wain diesel engines was out of the question.    In the end it all worked out.  We got a tugboat and hired some hands hanging about the docks looking for work.

The Royal Scotsman had birthing for a few hundred passengers, a massive main hold for cargo and in-between decks for cattle.   As with the Athena she had been pushed hard by her previous owners – a lot of cleaning was required.    Bright idea – go to St Hill and recruit sea org members.    Not sure how many were recruited during that period but this I do know; the day LRH arrived with some of the crew from the Athena the Scotsman was spotless.

While I was on the boat buying mission in Scotland the Athena sailed from Las Palmas to Gibraltar, where she was left under the captaincy of John O’Keefe.    It was from there that LRH and crew came to join the Scotsman in Southampton.

A few days after being joined by the crew from Gibraltar we were all set to leave, but the British authorities had other ideas.    The British board of trade required all sorts of certificates and documentation from us before they would permit us to sail.     I think this was the reason for us hiring a non-scientologist chief engineer, a certificated boson and carpenter.    As for the certificates we required for the life rafts, life boats as well as some other stuff, it was left up to Jill to handle the authorities, which she did very well.    We eventually got Clearance to sail for Brest in France, just across the channel.      Once there we were supposed to get the work done as stipulated by the British board of trade, which of course we had no intention of doing.     At that stage LRH was captain and I chief officer.

As we headed south, passing Brest on our portside, LRH called all senior officers into his cabin.     Then he made a gesture as if falling off his chair.    Did you feel that, he asked.     Puzzled we looked at each other – feel what?    What’s the matter with you guys, he said, can’t you tell when you are in a really bad storm.   Then we got the message.   We were supposed to have by-passed Brest because the bad weather made it impossible for us to enter.


Relax and enjoy the sun

What followed were several idyllic weeks, the likes of which was probably never experienced in the SO again.   We were truly on an Ocean cruise which became a Mediterranean cruise once we sailed pass the Pillars of Hercules (Gibraltar) and entered the Med.    After that cruise I never again saw an SO crew, including LRH, nearly as laidback for such a length of time.   With so few of us onboard everyone could enjoy the luxury of lots of free space    I loved my job and looked forward to being on watch late at night or early morning.    Few things compare to being out at sea on a starry night in fair weather.

Pleasant as things were, eventually we had to face the problem of not being able to go into a port for supplies or anything else.   We were still sailing under the British flag and since we were only cleared to sail to Brest from Southampton we had a problem.   (The excuse that we couldn’t enter Brest because of bad weather was in retrospect a no brainier).     Solution – register the ship under a different flag and escape any restrictions placed on us by the British board of trade.

We were a couple of miles off the coast of Majorca.    Using lifeboat number 8 the two guys selected for the mission of changing the ships nationality was taken in the dead of night and dropped off on some deserted beach.

After that commando style operation the Apollo sailed around aimlessly for awhile longer.   Eventually we came within a mile or so off Monte Carlo and several of us went ashore in lifeboat number 8 to send telex’s and establish comm. with the outside world.    Why do I keep referring to lifeboat number 8?    It was the only one with an engine – a not too reliable an engine I might add.  On this occasion as we approached the Monte Carlo harbor, lined with multi million dolor yachts, number 8’s engine packed up and we had to be rescued and towed in by a harbor launch.   So, what’s the big deal?    Here is the thing; I am convinced that our rescuers in there stylish jumpsuits, on their “perfect boat”, had never laid eyes on such a scruffy bunch of desperado’s.    They must have thought for a moment that we were boat people escaping from some North African country.

Here is beautiful Monte Carlo one of the most elegant harbors in the world.

At some point after Monte Carlo we obviously got our new flag and new nationality (Sierra Leon).    From there we called on several ports, sometimes staying in one place for long periods of time.    The Royal Scotsman, I think, had by now become the Apollo, LRH promoted himself to commodore and I became captain of the Apollo.

I am not certain of the sequence of events and places around this time but I do recall certain places due to particular incidents.     For instance, a memory of serene peace at dawn and the echo from minarets across the bay as the faithful were called to prayer places me in Tunis North Africa – as does the incident of the Apollo drifting helplessly into the channel without engines after someone had let go the last mooring line.   The most memorable meal I have ever had puts me in Marseilles France where several of the Apollo crew where entertained by an official and his wife.   Recalling the entire bow of the Apollo disappearing into one of the biggest straightest waves I ever saw locates me on the Atlantic side of Morocco as we left the port of Agadir.    An incident of the Apollo getting ripped loose from her moorings by a gale-force wind reminds me of Cagliari Sardinia.   The most physically exhausted I have ever been takes me to just before we entered Milatzo Sicily – I had been on the Athena’s bridge during a storm for two days and two nights.   The sequence of events during this time of us cavorting around these exotic places may be a bit fuzzy but the experience is not.   Take that other lifeboat number 8 incident for instance – it is worth expanding on.


Life boat number 8 ~ again

The Athena I believe was in Gibraltar at the time she was ordered to join the Apollo in Cagliari.    On route she ran into one hell of a blow.    I am not to sure how LRH got news of the Athena’s encounter with this storm, but he called me up to his office and told me to take some people and go meet the Athena several miles out.    O’Keefe, the Athena’s captain, I think was to be replaced, some other changes were to be made and the Athena was to be sent back to Spain.   Hanna (Whitfield) wore the HCO hat – she was to handle the ethics side of things.    Anyway, my job was to get the “mission” to the Athena and back – in lifeboat number 8.   There was a designated engineer for the trip and I remember Baron Berez being the communicator.    Altogether we were about 8 or 9 people in the lifeboat.

It was already dark when we set out to rendezvous with the Athena.     Since we picked her up on the Apollo’s radar before we left we had some idea of the course on which she was coming in.     The further we went out the choppier the sea became.     It was a dark night, windy and turbulent.    Vision was poor.    All shore lights had long since disappeared behind us and we were completely surrounded by blackness.      Anyway, at some point we spotted the Athena’s navigation lights.   They were probably told by radio to look out for us.      She kindly presented us with a lee so that we could come along side without too much trouble.

It immediately became obvious that this ship had been through something really bad.    Rust streaks were everywhere as if the waves had “sandblasted” the hull and superstructure.    The two large bins meant to carry extra meat and which were fixed to the aft deck by several 12 millimeter bolts, were gone.     The bolts had been completely sheered off by the force of the waves.    I looked up my buddies who were part of Athena crew.     I remember Graig Lipsitz, looking like he hadn’t slept for a week, so did Fred Payer.    Yvonne Gilham looked tired but as usual she was smiling and quite expressive in her account of the event.     There were actually several guys who didn’t seem too be hassled by their experience.    I suppose what I saw to a large extent was the relief that it was over.     Little Margarita, the non-scientologist Spanish staff member from Las Palmas, seemed unfazed, even exited while she told me what went down.    So, while I was being entertained by Margarita, the serious ethics stuff was being implemented.      I got the distinct impression that the Athena crew was not too happy about being sent back.

Our mission done, we got back into the lifeboat and hung about to see the Athena turn around and head back to Spain.    It was now about 23.00 and the wind had picked up quite a bit – waves were much bigger.     OK, I said to the engineer, start the engine and let’s get the hell out of here.    An hour or so later we had still not managed to get the engine started.    Here we were bobbing up and down, getting wet, being cold, in pitch darkness and no engine.    Well it was inevitable; suddenly there was the crackle on the radio held by Berez.    It was LRH.    He wanted to know where we were and when we expect to get back.     Berez gave the old man a brief rundown on what was happening.      After some advice from LRH to the engineer he went off the air.    But not for long.    Soon the howling wind became blocked out by the sound of the old man’s voice over the radio as he yelled instructions.

The scene was something like this;    At first, communication between LRH and us, via Berez, was about getting the engine started.     When this didn’t work out it was about getting us to row the boat.   Anyone who has ever tried to row a typical lifeboat in more than meter high waves will tell you, it’s a waste of time and energy.    Anyway you can imagine how the volume of the old man’s voice steadily increased during these attempts to run the show from the Apollo via a radio.

Apart from us merely going through the motions of carrying out these impractical instructions another scenario was unfolding.     After the initial communication and as the “heat” was turned up by the old man, Berez decided It was no longer wise to be at the receiving end of this erupting volcano.    Next thing I know Berez chucks the radio to me.    As it flies through the air there is this thundering voice emanating from it.    I catch it and decide instantly; no way.   I immediately chuck the radio to someone else, who clearly had also decided that they would rather skip this opportunity to converse with the commodore.      Just as quickly the radio is passed to another who also figures they will give it a miss and chucks it to someone else.   I know this went on for a few minutes until someone boldly reestablished comm.    It seemed now that LRH finally realized the situation.    Once the engine packed up we were left with two options.    One; we make ourselves as comfortable as possible and wait till dawn, hoping the weather won’t get worse.    Two; someone comes out as soon as possible and tows us back into port.

As it turned out LRH informed us that the Diana (a 65 ft SO ketch) was coming out to tow us in.     We figured it would take her close on two hours to get to us; all we can do now is cuddle up to each other and try to keep warm.   By this time staying dry was out of the question.     Then, out of the blue, someone says; who feels like a drink, holding up a bottle of vodka.    Our hero, I can assure you.    We passed the bottle around, each taking a gulp.   The bottle made only one round and it was empty.

A wonderful sense of camaraderie settled over us as we relaxed and began to see the humor in it all.    It seemed that we stopped resisting the considerable motion of the lifeboat.    I recall me sitting back thinking; I wouldn’t change this for anything.

After about two hours there was the Diana with LRH looming large, bullhorn in hand.     We took the tow line and got back in port just as dawn was breaking.     And for whatever reason the old man told the cook to fix us all a very special breakfast.


Mission into Time

At some point Apollo wound up in Valencia Spain.   Alongside was the Athena.    We were preparing for Mission into Time.    For this venture I was transferred to the Athena as captain with orders to ready the boat and crew.    I was given carte blanche to pick my crew from all aboard the Apollo and Athena.    There were a few exceptions; Mary Sue and a few others held key org posts and couldn’t be spared to go off “treasure hunting”.    I think at this time my Wife Jill was CO of the AO in Alicante Spain.  .

For my work done in getting the Athena and crew ready for the Mission into Time I became the first SO member to be put in a condition of power.    I guess my head would have swollen a size or two had I not known the politics behind such awards.

And this brings me to one of the most profound magical moments in my SO career; the night we sailed out of Valencia on the good ship Athena.    After we had left port and the initial excitement of the crew started subsiding and all had had a good meal, most began to seek out their bunks.    Eventually, around midnight, everyone apart from the crew on watch was asleep, including LRH.    Inside the wheelhouse (bridge) there was only the helmsman (wish I could remember who he was) and the quartermaster (I remember her well).   Up top on the flying bridge was a lookout (can’t remember who he was either).   Down below in the engine room was the engineer on watch.   Apart from the occasional thump of a wave against the bow and the swoosh of spray against the bridge superstructure all was quite.   Once in awhile the lookout would report something.

There was a stiff breeze, but to me it felt more like the caress of some mischievous sea nymph.    There were sizable waves but all they did was gently rock the Athena like a mother would her child.   Wind and sea played along beautifully.     As I stood outside on the bridge wing peering out into the darkness feeling the occasional salty spray on my face, I thought to myself; it doesn’t get any better than this.   And so Mission into Time began.

Mission into Time definitely had its moments, much of which was not covered in the book.    For instance I don’t think it is mentioned that the terrain LRH wanted us to check out was surrounded by barbed wire and out of bounds to the public.    The area was also guarded by armed Italian guards.   What to do?   Solution; get some hot SO chick (NF) and an Italian speaking SO member (NP), arm them with a couple of cartons of cigarettes and turn them loose on the guards.   It didn’t take “Laura Croft” and “James Bond” long to lure the guards into the guard hut and distract them while a couple of us jumped the fence and carried out our mission.

A week or so before completion of Mission into Time I was sent on mission to St Hill to sort out some org business.    Hanna took over from me as captain.   By the time I had finished this particular St Hill mission the Athena had sailed for Marseilles.    There I rejoined her and was again appointed captain.   Within days of resuming captaincy the proverbial shit hit the fan.

But first; The balance is disturbed

By this time most ethics conditions had been formulated and were being implemented.     But, it would be awhile yet before the mindless application of these conditions would become a dominant characteristic of many SO members.    Consolidation at its worst.

Scientology (the SO in particular), being the kind of organization it was, attracted to it some strange characters with all kinds of flaws and qualities.   

During the pioneering phase of the SO it was these unique personalities each with their peculiar characteristics who served as midwife and nurse to the SO.    But as the child grew change became necessary – more consolidation was required.

In terms of pioneer and consolidator it is never a case of either or; in any enterprise there is always a bit of both.  The real issue is one of balance.    Creating a winning culture depends on the correct ratio between independent innovative and creative personnel (pioneer types) and those who keep proper records and maintain the infrastructure of an organization (consolidators).

It is my opinion that SO orientation began to tilt in favor of consolidation not long after Mission into Time and the shift really accelerated after the Corfu incident.    From then on forward emphasis on total commitment to The Cause grew rapidly and individual innovation and creativity wasn’t merely discouraged it became a real no-no.

I wouldn’t be surprised if it were found that a growing imbalance in the Tech Admin ratio coincided with the rise of the consolidator (administrator).


Back to the story.

While in Marseilles LRH had moved ashore into a villa.     Problem was he was never cleared through immigration or customs.    As it happens, where the Athena was docked it was possible to go outside the harbor parameter without going through a check point.   The point is, on arrival in Marseilles, whoever’s responsibility it was to see that all was legal for LRH to go ashore didn’t do so.   Now the authorities wanted to lock the old man up for illegally entering France.    It took days of delicate negotiation with French authorities to get the situation handled – delicate from our side and typically indelicate and expressive from the side of the French.   It was a feather in the cap of our negotiating team to keep LRH completely out of the fracas.    I must add I doubt if we would have pulled it off without the help of the local French rep from the company doing work on our engines.

During this particular stay in Marseilles some interesting organizational developments took place.    Up until then the flagship captain and other ship captains were answerable to the commodore.   At that point the Athena was the flagship.    What LRH was now working on was the refinement of the commodore’s staff org.   Vital to its establishment was to impose and affirm seniority of the CS’s over the ship captains.    I don’t know the details of what LRH told his CS’s up in the villa, but I had a pretty good idea.    I had been in that position myself when briefed by him to assert the SO’s authority during the first SO mission to St Hill.

For instance, this is how early efforts to establish the authority of the CS’s manifested.   After the completion of work done on the Athena’s engine it was time for sea trials.     LRH would be represented by CS 4, now in charge of all SO ships.   As CS 4 walked onto the bridge I detected that he wasn’t very comfortable, in fact he was seriously uptight.     Out at sea I gave the helmsman the course to steer.    And then it happened.   CS 4 stepped up and said we should set a different course.    For a moment I thought he was just trying to be helpful; then I realized he was dead serious and in the process of asserting his seniority.    What followed lasted probably only 10 seconds.    The verbal abuse I hurled at CS4 in that short time would have made any sailor proud.    I can’t recall him saying another word after that.

I was never censured for this outburst by the powers that be up at the villa, but I knew it was noted.    Then there was the time when 2 CS’s reported to LRH that the crew was unfriendly to them – they weren’t shown the respect due to them.    That was when I got a phone call from the commodore ordering me to comev the entire crew, which I refused.

During the following weeks several attempts were made to “legally” get me out the way to make way for LRH’s intended consolidation.   I was comeved a couple of times on the most transparent trumped up charges, none of which could be made to stick.  (Diana Hubbard was chairperson on one of those comeves that didn’t get the desired result).    Now you may ask; since when was false evidence an obstacle to finding the accused guilty?    Suffice it to say that prevailing circumstances were in my favor.

Exactly when this next incident took place is unclear.    But, in a face to face conversation with LRH, he pointed out that he needed to introduce the next step in organizational development – not in those words exactly, but the message was clear.      In order for him to do so certain changes had to be made.   For instance, captain Joe’s authority had to be curtailed.   And since the methods employed up to then had failed to do so – what do I suggest?     My suggestion was that I go to the AO in Alicante and join my wife, the CO, whom I hadn’t seen in months.   Also since I haven’t been active in Tech for sometime it would be nice to get behind an e-meter for a change.    This was ok’d by LRH.

Now I won’t blame any ex SO members or those still in, to question or simply dismiss the validity of this story.    Imagine LRH casually admitting to what amounts to the manipulation of ethics policy to get his way and what’s more, admitting to having failed at it.    The best I can do to corroborate my story is to refer to the records.    If copies of comeves and orders of the day of that time are still around it shouldn’t be difficult to line up the sequence of events leading up to my eventual transfer to the AO in Alicante.

My stint at Alicante was mainly uneventful.     The flamenco dancing to which Fred Payer introduced me was of course amazing.


He and I and some others from the org were regular patrons at the castle up the hill where the shows took place.   We were fortunate enough to become very well acquainted with the dancers and musicians in the troop.   The catalyst for this was a girl from the AO for whom the lead guitarist in the flamenco troop had the hots.   The result was that the troop would often join us after their show, dancers and all.   What I learnt first hand from these people about flamenco tradition and passion was fascinating.


Magic, coincidence, the procedure or simply the power of mind? 

There was another incident at Alicante which has relevance to my views on the overall approach of Scientology to the human mind and soul.    In this regard I will outline the conclusions of my journey through Scientology and a wide range of metaphysical, scientific and other teachings dealing with body, mind and soul at a later stage.   So for now I am simply stating an observation with no bias as to the actual cause – magic, coincidence, the procedure or simply the power of mind.

In the course of my journey before, during and after scientology I have witnessed and experienced things which seemed, at the time, to be beyond explanation within the context of generally accepted frames of reference.     This particular incident occurred during an auditing session with me as the auditor.    Joan Thomas, who was the director of review at Alicante, handed me the folder of a pc in trouble.     After I had gone over it and seen the pc I told Joan that this pc needed a doctor and a large doze of antibiotics.   Half the pc’s face was swollen and looked like a soccer ball.   One eye was completely shut and the other closed up about 70%. 

 The pc was in terrible agony.  Joan wasn’t falling for any of my attempts to get out of taking on this pc.    So EFF and I went into session.     About an hour into the session during an assessment with three items left on the list I suddenly saw the TA blow down from 5 to 2.    The pc gave out a loud scream, yelling out one of the remaining items.    At that instant the apses in her ear burst with puss streaming out.    Within seconds of the pc identifying the item the swelling began to subside and the pain was gone.     By the time we arrived at the examiner EF’s face was almost back to normal.   I must add, memorable as this session was, it wasn’t the only time I witnessed such dramatic phenomena as an auditor.

No doubt many auditors throughout their auditing careers have seen some strange things happen and there is certainly something to be learnt from it all.  As inferred earlier, I will outline my views and conclusions on such matters later.

At some point Alicante AO was closed down and Jill and I were ordered to rejoin the Apollo in Corfu Greece.   Not having had a break for some time, we applied for leave, which began at Victoria station in London.   From there we traveled by train right through Europe down the boot of Italy to Brindisi.     During the trip we stayed over at places like Paris and Rome to do some sightseeing.     From Brindizi we crossed over to Corfu by ferry and were back on the Apollo.


Corfu; A turning point

Within days of being back on board I was assigned captain.   At first we had excellent relations with the locals.    We were wined and dined by the local governor as well as two brothers who represented the most prominent family on the Island.   In the case of the two brothers I suspect that their interest in us had more to do with the many very attractive women aboard the Apollo than anything else.

Our stay in Corfu was a lengthy one.  At first we were anchored out in the bay, during which period we had to come in once or twice to dock and take on fuel and water. While LRH and his staff were busy running orgs world wide my job was pretty straight forward, hence I was always on the look out for challenges.   Like the time I took up a challenge from LRH a day before we had to go into dock.   Here is the thing; as I said the Apollo initially anchored out in the bay.  

 We had both, port and starboard, anchors out.    So what happened is that with each incoming and outgoing tide the boat swung 360 degrees around her anchors.   Imagine how entangled the two anchor chains became after awhile.    The view of LRH on the day before we were to go in was that it would be impossible to untangle the anchor chains from each other without the help of a tugboat.   I was to get a tug early the next morning to do the necessary. 

Instead I got up very early the next day, woke up the engineers and told them to start up the engines.  Once we had power I started playing with the port and starboard propellers, working them to get the boat swinging counter to the twist in the anchor chains.   It worked and we went in without any assistance from a tugboat.

At various times while serving as captain of the Athena and Apollo I got fired by the commodore only to be reinstated not long afterwards.   I think the least time between being fired and reinstatement was one day.   This happened while on Mission into Time.   I had just been fired the day before, don’t ask me for what.   

The next day as the Diana came alongside the Athena her mainstay got caught up in the Athena’s cargo boom.    There was enough of a swell to put serious strain on the Diana’s mast – it could break.   This was certainly the view of LRH as he screamed at the people standing round to do something.   I flipped off my shoes and virtually ran up the boom.    At the top I struggled a bit to undo the mainstay from the boom and eventually succeeded.    As I slid down the boom and reached the bottom LRH said, well done captain – instant reinstatement.

The time I got fired in Corfu went something like this.   One of the commodore’s messengers came up to me and informed me that the commodore wanted to see me.   At that point I had no reason to suspect that anything was wrong, but as I approached his office and noticed some of his aides including Mary Sue avoiding eye contact with me and making haste to vacate the area I knew – here it comes.   

Before I even entered his office there he was in my face screaming at me for making a dog’s breakfast of the ship.     Then he took a swing at me, I ducked and felt the swoosh of air over my head as he missed the target.   For a second there I thought he was going to go down as he lost his balance.    Next he screamed at me telling me to go fix up my mess.      I only found out what he was talking about once I got out on deck and one of the messengers informed me.

Here is the thing; the Apollo spent most of her life up north in very damp conditions.    Since she entered the Mediterranean Sea, the timber deck above the commodore’s office began to dry out.    As a consequence it resulted in some leaking into LRH’s office leaving visible rust streaks down the bulkheads.   The short of it is I was fired as captain, once again, and put on the deck force to fix up “my mess”.

It was during our stay in Corfu that the class 8 auditor’s course was launched.    The first batch of students to attend the course came from outer orgs.   There introduction to the SO environment was a baptism of fire as evidenced on the introductory class 8 tapes.     During the course over-boards became SOP.     And I must admit I had a pretty callous attitude regarding this practice until a particular incident influenced my views.   In other words, I saw nothing wrong in people being chucked off the aft deck until a friend of mine who couldn’t swim was over-boarded.    The terror and humiliation this guy had to endure was a sad day for me.

Once the first batch of class 8 graduates went back to their respective orgs, a bunch of SO auditors were put on the course of which I was one.    Now I have no doubt that for some being thrown overboard was not a pleasant experience.     However, there were quite a few to whom it really was no big deal.    To good swimmers and people used to diving off high places, it was no problem.    But as I said, I came to realize that to people who couldn’t swim it must have been a most harrowing experience.

Not too long after the class 8 course for crew Jill was assigned CO of the new “University of Scientology” which was to be established on the island.   .

It is a matter of record that we picked up some problems in Corfu.  To whatever extent the CIA or Interpol was blamed for the ships being kicked out of Corfu there were some shenanigans by certain crew members going on ashore which probably contributed to our PR taking a dip.

It is also general knowledge that we were given 24 hours to get out of Greece.    LRH called Jill to his office and asked her what she was going to do with “her org”, which was already fully staffed and ready to open for business.    I suggested that we set up in Copenhagen.     Why?    I had been there at some point earlier on another ship buying mission during which time I checked out the place and liked it.    So we loaded the org materials aboard the Athena and sailed out of Corfu.   Our next port was Naples in Italy where the future AODK crew and materials were offloaded to find their way across Europe to Denmark.    As for the Apollo, we where informed that she was about to disappear off the radar and will be out of comm. for some time.   It was a case of don’t call us we will call you.



The trip by train to Copenhagen was another Keystone cops episode.    Imagine changing trains several times with around 30 staff members along with huge trunks filled with AO materials.   A couple of places we only had a few minutes to change from one train to another.   When we got to Germany, we discovered some trunks filled with OT materials and course tapes including the class 8 tapes were missing – we had left it on the train in Milan.    Don’t ask.  If you have been around in the SO for awhile words aren’t necessary here.

Mike Stainsforth and one other were immediately sent back to find the stuff.   Imagine our relief when they caught up with us having successfully retrieved the material.    The coach with our stuff still aboard was found amongst hundreds of others awaiting cleaning and possible maintenance.

Having found the perfect building for an AO on a farm outside Copenhagen we set up shop.  Soon however we realized we had a problem.    

Simple fact was we had no established lower level feeder orgs – we had no established field.   Yet it was up to us to make things go right.    With very limited set-up funds, a crew to feed, rent to pay and no established field from which to cultivate an AO public, things looked kinda grim.    Keep in mind there was only one org in Europe at that time.   Paris was it with not much else going on.   We were supposed to get our public from SA, AUS and NZ, but that would take time.

In spite of this grim picture what follows next turned out to be another memorable period in my SO career.  Knowing that the org was in the hands of some very competent people I could get out there and do my thing.  Jill was without a doubt one of the best org CO’s I have ever known and I bet few equaled her since. Ask anyone who knew her.

First I spent some time putting a team together. I personally hand picked and recruited the people I wanted to work with.    The team consisted of about 8 really special people. 

Using a list of book buyers, a couple of us regularly set out making contact and setting up groups all over Europe.    And we made it fun.   On occasion we would “raid” St Hill UK for European, South African and Anzac pc’s and students – people who had signed up for services there before AODK was set up.     As you can imagine this didn’t go down well with the St Hill guys.   Eventually every time they saw us coming all they could say was; here come the Vikings.   

Of course the Guardians office freaked at our blatant Viking behavior and later tried to clip my wings via Mary Sue.  They never succeeded. .

Anyway, true to form, at some point a mission arrived from Flag to replace Jill and me at AODK.   It was obvious to me that after such a long absence Flag had to reaffirm an ethics presence across the planet.  In the case of AODK the mission immediately realized that they couldn’t simply fire us in typical SO fashion due to our involvement in the expansion of Europe.    Jill and I suggested that we write our own mission orders so as to complete what we started.   This was ok’d.   That’s when the two of us left for Germany and set up the Munich org from were we continued expansion to other parts of Europe.    Now I know much later after Jill and I had gone back to South Africa Bill Robertson came along setting himself up as the “founder” of Scientology in Europe.    Gerrrrrrrrrr.


Time to move on

I returned to the Apollo in the early 70’s without Jill, not sure exactly when.   My last job on Flag was an LRH project to compile all the internships up to class 12 auditor, which I completed.   At the time it wasn’t general knowledge that LRH intended to get back into the USA at some stage.  When I got wind of it I began pushing to be allowed to return to SA to my family; my wife and son who was born in Munich.   It wasn’t entirely true that the reason I wanted to get back to SA was to be with my family.   My enthusiasm for the SO was beginning to wane.  I felt increasingly uncomfortable in what I perceived to be a changing atmosphere – the organizational climate was becoming a bit too chilly for me.   This on its own would probably not have been reason enough for me to distance myself from Scientology.   The thing is I was beginning to have my own ideas about thetans, spirits and the overall nature of consciousness.  .

In the end I managed to get back to SA before the Apollo went across to the States.

Back in SA I joined Folo-Af, but from day one I had problems with my seniors, or rather, they had problems with me.    To cut a long story short; during my stay at Folo-Af I was expelled a couple of times by Flag and reinstated a couple of times.   Some effort was made by Flag to get me back to Flag.   On one occasion Delwyn Sanderson, with whom I had a very close relationship way back on the Apollo, was sent to find out what was up with me and try and bring me back.

Eventually I left Folo-Af and started doing my own thing.    If I had to put a time on when I finally broke with Scientology I guess it would be around 1980.    Since then I have continued on a journey of exploring the nature of consciousness. 

Just recently I finished a book – CHANGE YOUR MIND – CHANGE YOUR WORLD, which I am now in the process of trying to get published. But that is another story.


What a waste!

I have gone down the list of declared SP’s, the vast majority of whom I don’t know.    But of the names I do recognize most of them were at one stage dedicated, experienced, well trained Scientologists.   They all added value to the organization and most of them would probably still have been active had it not been for the seriously flawed benchmarks (policy) in accordance with which the value of a staff member is measured.

In simple terms, these people were measured not by what they gave to the organization but by the extent of their submission to “source”.   The individual contribution by many was considerable; in some cases vital to the survival of the organization.   Some such stories have been told but many more remain unacknowledged.

The matter of self-praise and ego aside, I did my bit to “keep the SO afloat” so to speak.

While in Cagliari the Apollo was moored stern to with several other ships moored similarly on either side.    In other words, there was this row of ships, side by side, with their sterns all facing the dock while their bows were held facing away from the dock by their anchors laid out in front of them.    Each ship was secured to the dock by at least 4 stern lines.   The distance between stern and dock was around 6 to 8 meters and the distance between ships approximately 40 meters.

On this particular day the wind was howling and exerting extreme pressure broadside on the large surface area of the Apollo’s side.    This put serious strain on the two port stern lines holding us to the dock.    I noticed this and had the crew put out our “insurance line” to support the other two port side lines.   This was a wire cable twice the thickness of the other lines.

Anyway Norman Starkey, who I think was the 2nd mate at the time, and I were in the aft lounge having coffee when it happened.    We heard a loud crack like sound.     I immediately knew what had happened; a line had snapped.    We ran up onto the aft deck and watched as the second line began to unravel under the strain.     Within seconds it too snapped followed by the next.    The Apollo was visibly beginning to pick up sideways momentum.

Obvious unfolding scenario:   The remaining starboard stern lines would not be able to stop the increasing sideways momentum of the Apollo.    Within less than a minute all remaining lines where going to break.   This would mean that within about two minutes or so we where going to be smashed up against the boat lying next to us.   The possibility of her stern lines holding against the impact of the Apollo crashing into her was unlikely.     We where looking at a high probability of a domino effect – each ship in turn being ripped from its stern moorings by the others being blown onto it.     But what about the bow anchors out front – wouldn’t they eventually prevent all these ships from being blown across the bay onto the rocks on the other side?    Fortunately this possibility was never to be put to the test.

Anyway, there we were; disaster staring us in the face but, as it turned out, it wasn’t inevitable.    Unlike most ships the Apollo had a stern anchor.    Since we had no use for it we consequently never used it and that presented a problem once I realized that our only hope of averting disaster was to let go the stern anchor.    The thing is that unless deck equipment like winches, anchors and stuff like that are regularly used or inspected the mechanisms become corroded and unusable.   So, to my horror I discovered that the devils claw holding the chain and the anchor brake were jammed solid.    To this day I don’t know where I got a crowbar from, but I used it to apply leverage to the brake wheel and bashed away with it to dislodge the devils claw.    Keep in mind every second was priceless.

Eventually the devils claw came loose and I got the brake wheel to turn.   But still the chain wouldn’t run.   It required several hefty kicks to loosen up the chain and down the anchor went with a splash.  This was not the end of it, there was no guarantee that the anchor would hold. 

To increase the chances of the anchor holding I had to allow some chain to run out.  But how much chain will do the trick? All stern lines had broken by now and the ship toward which we where moving looked like it was within spitting distance. I recall seeing, out of the corner of my eye, her crew scrambling around the decks panic stricken.  I picked my moment and applied the anchor brake. The Apollo kept moving as she took up the slack in the chain – now we were within actual spitting distance of the other ship.  Suddenly the Apollo lurched and rolled over slightly as the anchor bit into the ground.   I couldn’t believe it – the anchor held.     Imagine the dire consequences to the SO had things not worked out the way they did.

In the final analysis, what I am trying to say is that the organizational mindset of Scientology is inclined to waste its most valuable resource; highly trained, experienced and creative people.   Looking at most of the people I know on the list of Scientology enemies I see “what could have been” had different benchmarks been used to measure the value of people.


Was it worth it?

Do I think my time spent in Scientology was worth it?   Without a doubt.   Where else would I have come in contact with so many likeminded amazing people, many of whom became close friends of mine.    Not to mention the interesting adventures and exotic places I experienced.   As for the philosophy and technology of Scientology, for me it definitely served as a doorway to the exploration of consciousness.

I believe the real value of Scientology lies in its capability to get a shift in mindset – to get people to change their minds – to enable the individual to see things differently – to get people stepping outside conventional frames of reference.   And that is one hell of an achievement in this modern era.

“Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything”.    Ralph Waldo Emerson.    

What I do not go along with is when the technology prescribes what the individual should see, as reflected in the OT levels and OT 3 in particular.    In other words, the OT levels dictate the case the pc is to create.     And this messes with the core of consciousness, which is creation.    If a pc came up with OT 3 phenomena on his own accord that would be an entirely different matter, but to prescribe it is bypassing his fundamental creative nature.

Whether the story behind OT 3 is true or not is immaterial.    Some pc’s may be inclined to run incidents of Alice in Wonderland instead, but if that’s the reality which holds the pc’s attention then that’s where to go.   Anyway, that is my personal opinion.

L Ron Hubbard has come under some severe criticism over the years, some of which I know from personal experience is unfounded.  

This I know for sure, he had an amazing knack for getting people to achieve beyond what they believed was possible.    His expectation that people can jump higher than they thought they could somehow inspired them to do so.    And no, fear was not the catalyst in the instances I have in mind.

As far as his work in terms of the mind is concerned there can be no doubt that new ground was broken.     It is highly probable that once the controversy surrounding Scientology organizations die down he will be acknowledged for his contribution.    

But there are “truths” beyond the “truths” of Scientology.

Scientology Disconnection ~ Son has a Serious Accident

I just got this note from my friend Lori Hodgson last nite.  She was very, very upset because her son Jeremy Leake, was seriously injured in a motorcycle accident, is now in the hospital emergency room and she is not even allowed to see him!!!!


All this because of a disconnection policy that was cancelled back in 1968.  It is obvious that Jeremy has the wrong PTS item. Here is the story from a worried mother…



Here is my son Jeremy and his sister Jessica at the lake. They joined the SO and I have not been able to see them or talk to them again since. They are out of the SO and public now.  They were out 2 years ago and in the SO for only a short time.

I found out about his accident by a post on Facebook. No one notified me.
I called the hospitals and found out he was admitted to Santa Clara Valley Medical Hospital. I rushed over with my Dad and Stepmother to see him. I went to the ER and asked the status of my son and that I wanted to see him. I told them I was his mother.
They called to the back room where Jeremy was at and said I was here. The man at the front said, “The Hospital staff has been instructed to not let you go back to see him.” I told him “I have left the Church of Scientology and I am being shunned from seeing my son.”
Here is Lori with her children when they were a happy family before the disconnection.
Please let me see my son?”  He said “I am very sorry I can’t let you see him.” 
“With the Privacy Laws and your son being 18 I have to abide by the law.”  I asked if I could at least have his status and he said, ” No we can’t give out that information.”
Now I’m really panicked so I go around the back and wait for someone from The ER to come out. I briefly explained to a nurse what was happening and if he could please give my son a message. He said yes I can give him a written message.
The nurse brought Jeremy the message. He came back to tell me that Jeremy was alone in his room so he was able to give the note directly to him and that Jeremy said to tell me he is OK and that he doesn’t want to see anyone.   I was very relieved to hear that he was ok.
I know deep down in my heart that my son wants me with him but because of this cruel Disconnection policy of the Church of Scientology, he most likely feels forced to not break their rules!!!
I was able to find out that Jeremy broke his Femur and his Collar Bone and is scheduled for surgery tomorrow.

~~~~~~    ~~~~~~


The Church of Scientology is violating their own policies on PTSness and disconnection.


HCOPL Cancellation of Disconnection Policy 15 November 1968


“Since we can now handle all types of cases disconnection as a condition is cancelled”


Disconnection has been Cancelled!


This was not included in the altered new Miscavige versions of the Green Volumes!

Other policy’s being violated, no, raped!   Are…



“HCOPL PTS Type A Handling of 20 October 1981″


In that policy Hubbard NEVER, EVER, mentions the word disconnection. The handling according to that policy is….


 “Get in comm with the family member until the situation is resolved” 


HCOB  of 8 March 1983, Handling PTS Situations

 It says perfectly clear…

You coach him into two way communication that is well above 2.0 on the Tone Scale, that mostly consists of acks and mild interest in what is going on… in other words, you handle this in real life..”



HCOB 10 September 1983, PTSness and Disconnection

 In the section “Lost Tech” Ron says;  “Earlier disconnection as a condition was cancelled. It had been abused by a few individuals who failed to handle situations which could have  been handled and who lazily or criminally disconnected, thereby creating situations even worse than the original, because it was the wrong action.”







I was determined to see my son and this is what happened:

My mom and I found out what room he was going to be in and we waited by the elevator near his room. After he was settled in his room, Jim his father was standing by his bedside asking Jeremy if he wanted to see me.

Before Jim finished his sentence I went over to my son and said,  “Hi Jeremy I’ve been here for you all day and I’m so glad you’re doing well. I’m going to leave now so there is not a problem for you. I hope you get well real fast and I love you so very much.”

Jeremy looked at me and said, “I love you.”

Then I went to leave and saw my daughter talking to a nurse. I went up and hugged her telling her “I miss you and love you.”  Jessica hugged me back. Then her grandma gave her a hug.

This has been one hell of an emotional 2 days for me and my family.  Thanks for all your Love and support it means a lot!!!!

Lori Hogdson and her son Jeremy and daughter Jessica Leake in happier times.